10 Tips To Text After a First Date

Understanding how to text after a first date is always tricky. Your date went well, so you want a second. That’s not the tricky part. Figuring out what to do after the first date can be the hard part.

There’s the idea of the “three-day rule,” but why would you wait three days until you text the person you’re interested in?

Now, I don’t know how you handle yourself on a date or after the date ends. You could be amazing on the date, and your weak spot is the texting in between or vice versa. But we’re going to focus on after the first date.

# Don’t make a big deal out of it

This is for yourself. You’re texting someone; this isn’t a marriage proposal. You don’t need to be making this a big deal, even if you really like this person.

The minute you place them on a pedestal, you lose yourself. Remember, they’re human just like you. Relax, take a deep breath; it’s going to be okay. [Read: How to not rush into a relationship and avoid the crash and burn.

# Don’t text right away… but don’t wait too long

It’s a balancing act. You shouldn’t text them right away, give some space for them to digest the date. A little space never hurt anyone. That being said, you also should go with the vibes of the date. If you really hit it off, you don’t need to wait a day or two to text them. All I can say is, just don’t wait three days if you’re looking for a second date.

# Keep your goal in mind

What’s the entire point of you texting this person? It’s to get yourself a second date with them, right? Sure, you can chat with them, but plan your next date as soon as possible. You don’t want the high from your date to fade away. After a few text messages, see when this person is free again and make a plan.

# Start the conversation where you left off

If you don’t know what to say to them, start the conversation off with something you’ve talked about on the first date. It could be about a TV show they talked about, or some joke you two laughed at. This will help you ease into a conversation with them and get things going.

# Don’t go sexual with the texts

Of course, if you had sex on the first date, then ignore this tip as it doesn’t apply to you. But if you ended the first date with a hug or a kiss, don’t jump into the dirty talk before the second date. You don’t know how this person feels about you yet, and it could risk you seeing them again.

# Keep your messages short

You don’t need to write a short essay for your date. Keep your messages short. The real conversation you want to have should be in person, so save it until the second date. Long messages can add pressure to the other person, plus, they’re draining to read.

# If you’re a guy, no dick pics

If you’re a guy, unless a woman has specifically asked you for a dick pic, you should never send them to anyone. Sure, there is a chance she could respond positively to it, but it’s not respectful. Come on, you actually think dick pics are nice to look at? Think again. Keep it in your pants.

# Be flirtatious

But, don’t force it. When you’re wondering how to text after a first date, there’s a lot of pressure to be flirty, funny and really interesting. But remember this, if you have good chemistry, then flirting will come naturally, and that’s fine.

However, there are some people who feel like they need to force the chemistry to happen. Listen, if it’s not happening naturally, it’s not going to happen in the future. It’s fun to flirt, but only when the other person is equally invested in it.

# Keep the conversation light

You do not need to talk about religion and politics via text message, first of all. And you should definitely leave these topics until the second or third date.

You didn’t even land yourself a second date, and now you want to unload your feelings about these heavy subjects? Take it easy. Have a light conversation via text, leave the serious topics for in-person conversations.

# Go easy on the emojis

Now, I’m not a hater of emojis. I think they can be great for communication and getting the point across to someone and clear up any confusion. But you don’t need your message to be full of emojis. Keep it to a tasteful amount.