10 Tips To Keep in mind For Dating a Co-worker

The first thing that comes into mind before dating a co-worker is: Can you get fired for dating a co-worker? Well, if your office policies says so, then yes, you could get fired or transferred for your guilty pleasure. And don’t think that you’re one of the lucky ones if your office doesn’t have any such rule for dating co-workers, because then you are the hot topic for a hell lot of office gossip.

Be ready to face raised eyebrows and be under constant vigilance as your co-workers will be watching you like they watch a reality show.

This will become least of your concerns when you’ll have to compete with them for major projects and promotions. Not to forget the awkwardness that will kick in when the relationship ends. Feels too much, but sadly, it’s true. Dealing with a breakup with someone you see everyday, is another story altogether.

# Do: Establish ground rules first

The first thing that you should do before dating your co-worker secretly is to establish ground rules. Discuss about the various incidents in the work place where you both could be in a compromising situation.

Ensure that you both don’t work in the same department, and work on the same project together. This is very important because allegations that you are being partial to each other are bound to crop up.

Discuss about your career goals as well, as you both don’t want to be seen competing for the same position at the same time. Another red flag is to mix relationship with work. Establish that no matter what happens, you won’t mix your personal feelings with your professional relationship with him/her.

# Don’t: Share details with other colleagues

We all have our small little group of friends at work, where we love to share snippets of our lives with them. However, when you’re dating a co-worker, refrain from sharing the intimate details of your relationship with them.

You may tell them about your relationship and give casual responses like, “It is going well, still a bit early to say where it’s leading.”

Or, “We’re in a good place.”

Likewise, if you feel that a colleague likes you and you too have feelings for him or her, do not disclose details to avoid being a topic of gossip later.

# Do: Keep your work life and professional life separate

It is important that when you are at work, you both should treat each other like any other colleague. Maintaining a professional boundary with your partner is important as it will help you both concentrate on your work goals and will also help you both maintain a professional conduct in the work place.

Bringing your personal life to work will only make things more complicated. Imagine you both creating a scene at work because of a fight you had this morning. You don’t want that to happen.

# Don’t: Have sex in the office

As hard it is to resist, having sex in the office is a bad idea. Many of us have this fantasy of making out in the cabin or office washroom, while as sexy as it sounds, the more horrifying it could be later. Sex, or even making out in the office should be off limits. You could get fired if you’re caught for starters.

# Do: Stick to your career goals

When it comes to workplace romances, somewhere down the line you’ll find yourself mixing your personal feelings with work. You may see yourself making career sacrifices to make your relationship work. Remember your career goals and stick to them.

A relationship that forces you to make career sacrifices isn’t a healthy one. Imagine yourself denying a promotion because it will hurt your partner’s feelings, you don’t want that to happen. Make sure you discuss about such situations with your partner beforehand.

# Don’t: Restrict conversations to work

Many a times due to your professional relationship with your co-worker, all that you both talk about could be work. Your partner isn’t your work wife or your work husband, with whom you just keep sharing details about your work.

You both need to share your lives with each other as well. Talk about your childhood memories, fears, dreams and fantasies. Open up to each other at a deeper and personal level. If you are looking at the pros and cons of dating a co-worker then this is a con you need to avoid. Constant conversations about the workplace can drain you.

# Do: Think whether it’s worth it

Understand the risks of dating a co-worker. You could be fired if it’s against the company policies. You’re both risking your career for a relationship whose outcome you both don’t even know. Ask yourself whether sneaking around and keeping secrets is worth the risk.

And what happens if you go your separate ways? Coping and moving on after a breakup if you work in the same office can be tougher than you think.

# Don’t: Think you won’t get caught

A common misconception that couples indulging in workplace romances have is that they won’t get caught. Secrets have a way of catching up and everyone in the workplace is more observant than you think. If dating a colleague has severe repercussions, there’s some thinking that you need to do.

It could begin as a rumour and with one thing leading to another, before you know it the entire office knows about your workplace affair. Someone is bound to connect the dots and word spreads fast.

# Do: Discuss about handling things if you break up

When it comes to dating a co-worker, it is important for breakups to be dealt with maturely. There should be some dating a co-worker rules that you should follow diligently.

We hate to think about the possibility of a break up, especially even at the beginning of our relationships. But when it comes to workplace romances, you need to think about all possibilities.

# Don’t: Keep working in the same office if things get serious

If you are looking for our tips for dating a co-worker then the most important thing we would tell you is that if your romance gets too serious and you want to look at a future together then it’s best for one of you to look for other job options.

Except for some IT firms most companies do not encourage spouses working in the same organisation. So if you are planning to get married it’s best to ensure that you work in two separate companies before you tie the knot.