There's a reason why you may be allowing others to take you for granted. And in all probability, it starts and ends with self respect.
You don't respect yourself enough to believe you've done enough for someone. You constantly try to do something more or do something better just to compensate for what, you believe, you're lacking in.
And this behavior of yours pushes you to try harder to please others, and in return, you hope to be appreciated and loved. And when you don't feel appreciated and loved, you start to believe you're being taken for granted.
Do you seriously respect yourself for who you are, or do you need someone else's appreciation to reaffirm that you're a great person? Answering this question truthfully will help you realize why you're being taken for granted all the time. The easiest way to judge yourself and find out if you're someone who could be taken for granted by others is by testing your own character.
There are a few traits and characteristics of people who are vulnerable to be being taken for granted. And chances are, you have a few of these traits in yourself.
# You can't say no
You have a very hard time declining something to people. You'd rather take on more commitments or responsibilities than utter the word ëno'. You may think you're being sweet, but your inability to say no will only make others take your sacrifices for granted, and hate you when you don't help them again!
# You're predictableEveryone around you, especially your loved ones, can totally predict your behavior. And since you're so predictable, they subtly manipulate you and get you to do what they want. You may feel manipulated and used, but you feel helpless at the same time.
# You're too sweetYou're a people pleaser, and you just can't be rude to others. You convince yourself that you're the sweet person in a bad world, but in reality, you may be the idealist idiot in a real world who's too sweet and nice, and forces others to take you for granted even if they don't realize it themselves.
# You postpone decisionsYou'd rather make excuses or postpone issues that bother you instead of dealing with it or concluding it immediately. You may think pushing decisions away is the easy way, but in fact, it's the spineless way of dealing with your problems.
Your family, lover or friends who understand your inability to take tough decisions may abuse that side of you and make decisions on your behalf, and manipulate you into doing something you wouldn't want to do because they know you can't say no anyway!
# You can't confront peopleIf you feel like you're being taken for granted, confront the issue. If you can't confront the issue, you'd end up unhappy and fill your head with resentments and frustrations, which would eat you from the inside.
# You're scared
You're scared of people who are loud, outspoken, bossy, and confrontational. You just can't handle them and they stress you out emotionally. You'd rather accept what they say than ever go against them because you don't believe you can handle them.
You may think it's the best way to deal with rude people, but in reality, you're setting yourself up to be used and taken for granted by these kinds of people for the rest of your life.
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You lie to yourself
You lie to yourself and make excuses in your head when someone takes you for granted. You console yourself and tell yourself that the person probably took the right decision anyway and they're not using you or taking you for granted.
You're not happy doing what you're doing for this person, but you console yourself with false words that you're doing it out of free will and not out of this person's manipulation.
# You don't believe in yourselfSomewhere deep inside, you doubt yourself and don't believe in your own capabilities. You find flaws within yourself and you see other people as virtuous and flawless. You're broken from inside, and you feel a constant need to please others to be accepted by them.
# You can't be alone
You constantly feel the need to have someone as witness to your life. Independence scares you and you find it easier to go out of your way and be nice to someone who treats you badly instead of being lonely.
# You seek approval
You constantly need this person's approval to do anything at all, be it to go out with your friends or do something for the first time. When someone starts to take you for granted, without realizing it, you'd allow them to emotionally control you and use you as they please. And before long, you lose your sense of judgment and you forget that it's possible to independently make decisions for yourself.
# You don't know your own desiresEvery time you want to do something, even as simple as getting a new haircut or deciding on a restaurant, the voice in your head wonders if the object of your affection would like your decision. You always try to please this person, in everything you do, in the hope that they'd see just how loving and accommodating you are, hoping that they may realize just how much you're doing for them someday.