Ask yourself, would you want to keep talking to a guy if he made you yawn like 15 times in 7 seconds? Of course not! But youíd certainly lose track of time if you were in conversation with a guy who made you laugh all the while. The same goes with guys. Yeah, theyíre not from Mars as popular opinion has it. The same rules that apply to you, apply to them as well. If youíre interested in a guy and canít get enough of him and wish the conversations with him never end, you gotta keep things interesting. And that doesnít involve nudes (although thatís a matter of personal choice). But this discussion is about more non-PG level techniques to keep a conversation going forever, both over text or in person. Lets get to them:
# Be genuinely interested to know the guyI know youíre like, Why would I even bother if I wasnít interested in him? But often, we like a guy because heís cute or hot, but do we really want to know about his passion for being a Dungeon Master (this is just a video game, not THAT kind of role playing, silly)? You have to be really, genuinely interested in knowing all aspects of him for a conversation to be mutually interesting and therefore, steady. If youíre not, sooner or later youíll find yourself bored and sooner or later heíll find that out and lose interest and motivation to keep talking to you. Ask questions and learn about the guy with real enthusiasm and excitement.
# Get learning about his favorite topicsIt is all right to take inspiration from a '10 best conversation starters' article, but it is unsafe to assume that you know what his interests are. Just because someone said that guys are sports freaks, it might not be exclusively true of your guy. He might hate the obsession over sports for all you know and talking endlessly about Manchester United vs Chelsea will lead to nowhere. So before you jump to start a carefully planned conversation, learn about his favorite topics first. You could ask him about his hobbies, for example. If he watches a lot of movies, itís a great place to start the conversation. He might also be passionate about politics and social work, which make for good conversations too.
# Ask questions about his childhoodEven if the guy has absolutely no hobbies, interests or passion (that isnít usual TBH but for the sake of discussion, letís say heís an alien in disguise or something), there are a couple of things anyone will always have a lot of talk about. His childhood, for example. Ask him where he grew up, about his family and his childhood friends and whether heís still in touch with all of them. Thereís something about nostalgia that makes people keep talking. This is a great way to ensure a long conversation without even having to try too hard. And if heís really an alien after all, maybe youíll learn some cool things about a different planet too.
# Ask about his job and workplaceAnother common topic that can keep a conversation alive even if thereís not much else to talk about, is work. If the guy is an adult professional, heís spending most of the time in a day working. Naturally, he has a lot of talk about on that front. The projects that heís working on, his boss who gives him a hard time or a colleague who makes life easier at work for him ó or something along those lines. If you show real interest, he might also gleefully delve into minute details of the current project heís been passionately working on. You might also become his favorite go-to person whenever he needs a listening board for problems with work he canít discuss with anyone else. Longterm conversation benefit!
# Talk about a picture he posted on social media
This is a great way to keep the conversation flowing over text. You can use the excuse of commenting on the guyís recent social media activity. Maybe heís posted a status update you have an opinion to share about (even if you donít, just get with it!) or he might have posted a picture, in which case, a compliment is a must. In order to make the conversation go even longer, ask him specifics about the picture instead of just a compliment. Like, who took the picture, where was it shot, it looks like a great place to have a beer in, etc. Taking note of his activities also makes him see that youíre interested in him, which is reason enough for a guy to want to make a conversation with you. However, take care not to make it look like youíre stalking him all day. Thatís not fun, thatís crazy.
# Make sure you have knowledge on various subjects tooAll said and done, a fun, naturally flowing conversation is much more than a handful of techniques and conversation starters. It is about real knowledge. If you donít know stuff, you canít talk about stuff. Some common topics that make for long, continuing conversations, either through text or face-to-face, are current trends, global issues, etc. Read the newspaper regularly, follow recent trends on Reddit, Huffington Post, or any of your favorite blogs. Donít be the girl who looks great but is empty inside the head. Being knowledgeable isnít just about impressing guys, itís about actually knowing what goes around in the world, which is a very cool girl quality. Your knowledge on diverse topics will impress any person, guy or girl, and make a conversation with ANYONE last forever.
# Keep the conversation warm, friendly and funny
Often, if
thereís a romantic tension between you and the guy, thereís a lot of
conscious hesitation to converse freely, because you want to present
yourself as this perfect person, and avoid any awkwardness from being
stupid. If both you feel this way, this could be one reason the
conversation doesnít last very long, even though youíre both interested
in each other. You have to initiate the process of getting the comfort
level on. Learn to let go and keep things down to earth, because thatís
when it will put the guy at ease too, so he will be able to keep talking
without the fear of being judged. Being silly occasionally is a great
way to come closer to each other. Knowing that the other person is as
human as us, helps us open up better. A warm, friendly conversation
makes for a fun conversation, and who has ever passed on anything that
is fun?
# Avoid sensitive questions like past relationships
Even if youíre doing everything right, there are some no-go places that you need to be careful of. If youíve been asking him questions about his life in general, you might get too close to asking him questions that the guy is sensitive to, and he might shut you off completely. It is okay to talk about love and relationships in general, but donít get too personal with it unless he decides to bring it up himself. It is a great move to want to know about him ó plus it is also natural to feel curious about who he dated and why they broke up ó but know your limits and donít cross them. If the guy feels comfortable enough, heíll soon start pouring his heart out to you.
# Ask questions that makes the guy think
Asking the same old tired questions makes the conversation dull in no time. If the guy has been doing this for a while, chances are high that heís been answering the ëWhatís your favorite movie?í or ëWhatís your favorite color?í questions too many times for him to be even interested anymore. Steer clear of things that make him feel like heís caught in a rut. Ask him thoughtful questions instead. Thoughtful here means, questions that makes him think hard before he can answer, and questions that makes him see that youíre a deep thinker too, not some shallow bimbo. And no, Iím not referring to tough GK questions (although if thatís your thing, no harm in trying), but questions about his mind and his dreams. Questions like what steps would he take if he were the President of the United States, or what his interpretation of the movie Forrest Gump is. Questions like these get you dive deep into your mind which is a treasure trove of discoveries that keep your conversation on for a long, long time.
# Share your own experiences
A follow-on from #7, a great way to make him feel comfortable to share his experiences at length is to share yours first. Pick the silliest, most awkward and funny incidents. Describe them at length. This will achieve two results. First, youíll make him laugh which is a great attribute for any person to have, and he will remember conversations with you to be thoroughly enjoyable. Second, youíre basically showing him what he should do by ding it first yourself. When you open up to the guy without inhibitions, he will feel encouraged to do the same. And rest assured, most guys WANT to keep going about themselves, showing themselves off to you. All they need is a little assurance that youíre totally fine with them doing that.
# The right body language can help the conversation
Your interest in the guy, which is an important selling point for him to keep talking to you, can be expressed not just with your words but also with your body language. The guy might be reading his self-help articles too you know, in which case he knows that a girl whoís interested in him will show in the way she behaves. Make steady eye contact during the conversation, but not so much as to scare him off and make him stammer. Relax your posture and smile and laugh often, to make him feel like his efforts at making a conversation are working. If youíre chatting over text though, this wonít be possible. But over text, you can make up for it by using lots of relevant emojis or sending voice notes occasionally. Even if the guy is making the conversation, it is important that over text you keep sending your replies often because obviously he canít see you listening to him.