More and more couples seem to be writing their own marriage vows these days. Susan and I did the same thing 26 years ago. Ours included some traditional vows but also reflected the uniqueness of our personalities and commitment before God to one another. Then, after we got married, we discovered our differing gifts and divvied up household responsibilities according to those gifts. For example, Susan is the financial person, so she pays the bills. I can fix things; when something is broken, I repair it.
While wedding vows, personalities, responsibilities, and many other things will differ from marriage to marriage, there are nonnegotiable marriage expectations that should be the same for all spouses. Husbands and wives should be able to expect certain things from one another.
So here are 15 things your wife should expect from you. Remember: Each is a way in which you demonstrate your love for her.
1. Attracts her with looks, manners, and attitude:Women want their men to be attractive, not just physically but also in their behavior and thoughts. Be chivalrous, have a sense of humor, groom yourself, and have a pleasant temperament. Above all, be honest in your relationship with her.
2. Pays for her necessities and luxuries too:
Even if your wife is financially independent, she might want you to spend on her. A woman may not want to take the burden of providing the livelihood for the family. She doesn’t mind supporting you, but would like to have the man of the house earn for her family.
3. Has a kind heart:If you see a distressed puppy out in the cold, don’t just ignore it. Bring it home and nurture, it will help you score points as a husband. Women prefer a partner who is considerate, thoughtful and kind to others. They desire for a man who could console her during tough situations, is loving and attentive to people.
4. Gives her respect:You surely expect her to respect you. Show her the way by respecting her. Mutual respect forms the foundation of your relationship. Do not take your wife for granted. She may be doing a tiresome job at home same like you do in the office. Rather than putting her down, try to appreciate her hard work and respect her role as mother, wife, and caretaker of the family. Tell her how much you value her contribution.
5. Is honest with her:A woman cannot accept infidelity or dishonesty in her relationship. She desires a partner who is truthful so that she can stay secure and relaxed. If you are dishonest, even occasionally, you will lose her trust, and she will begin suspecting you even for the right things you do.
6. Is sensitive to her feelings:Sensitivity coupled with a bit of spontaneity is something that pleases women. Although the independent modern woman likes to live her life in her way, a bit of pampering can definitely make her come closer to you.
7. Is matured:
Women love to stay in a relationship with a man who is responsible and mature. Maturity is often linked to stability, and that’s what women fall for. Wives like their husbands to be mature so that they can handle situations in an organized manner.
8. Keeps up the promises:If you have promised your wife or children to take them for a weekend movie or outing, stick to the commitment. Fulfill it so they are not disappointed. A man who keeps his promises attracts his wife without much effort.
9. Listens to her:
Pay attention to what she says. Turn to her when she is talking and look at her. It gives her the confidence that you are listening to her. If you are busy on your laptop or mobile phone, it will frustrate her, ruining the atmosphere at home. Allocate at least an hour every day for her, while having breakfast or dinner. Talk about the day’s work, and ask about her day.
10. Believes in her:
Trust her when she says she can handle a situation. Leave it to her instead of interfering and doing it your way. Be there to guide her, but see how she will face the situation.
Similarly, if she shares her fears or apprehensions, do not brush them aside. Understand her problem and address it.
11. Wears his confidence:A man who is confident but not arrogant is a favorite among women. A confident man can overcome any obstacle and solve problems that come his way. A woman likes to be in a relationship with a confident man, who can take care of the family under any situation.
12. Makes her feel safe:
Safety. That is one thing that matters a lot to a woman. She likes to be with a man who is there to safeguard her. When she goes out with her man, he should have the courage to protect her.
13. Expresses his love for her:You need not keep saying ‘I love you’ day in and day out like a routine. But you can express your love regularly. Those three words will continue to do their magic even after 25 years of your marriage. It gives your wife the confidence that she has chosen a man who is true to her, and will treat her like a queen.
14. Surprises her from time to time:A surprise does not always involve an expensive gift. Buy her a rose ‘just like that’ and see her blush red like the rose. After a tiresome day, make her forget all her problems by planning a simple candle-lit dinner at home. Or prepare a delicious supper by the time she returns from work. These are small gestures but make a big impact on your relationship.
15. Gives her space:A woman’s life is not just about her husband and kids. Just like you, she, too, wants to spend time with her friends or have a calm evening reading her favorite book. She deserves her private time after all the hard work she puts in to keep you and the children happy.