Your sex drive is all in your head well, in your brain, that is. Foreplay isn’t limited to what happens in the bedroom. Every interaction with your partner is a chance to get in the mood, or out of it. We looked at the research and talked to relationship experts to determine five fully clothed ways to engage in what’s called the “other” foreplay: ordinary but powerful actions that can increase intimacy between you and your partner.
Oh, and they all take place well outside the bedroom, which means you can start implementing these foreplay ideas right now.
* Try something new togetherEver notice that you have more sex on vacation? There’s a psychological reason for that, and it’s called expansion theory. In a nutshell, expansion theory posits that people are highly motivated to expand their horizons. This is why we often prefer the new and exciting over the old and familiar. Sure, you love your partner, but you’ve “been there, done that.” The personality traits that initially charmed you are old news, if not occasionally annoying.
You can’t make your partner seem completely mysterious, nor would you want to, but one way to revive intimacy is to try something new together that you’re both excited about. A vacation is one idea, but there are many other affordable options, like a new cuisine or a class.
* Pitch in with ‘chore play’A recent study has found that women whose husbands help with housework are happier in their marriages. Another study states that men who help with chores tend to have more sex than men who don’t. Coincidence? We think not. When both partners pitch in at home, there are more opportunities to make housework sexy (did somebody say housekeeper fantasy? A little French maid number never hurt anyone). Try cleaning the house together to a sultry soundtrack, or dusting halfway in the buff. Use makeout breaks as incentives for completing tasks. See for yourself if you start looking forward to otherwise mundane activities. Who knows, ‘loading the washing machine’ might become your new favorite sex position.
* Exercise togetherA sexy partner isn’t just a good thing to have. It’s a good thing to be — women especially enjoy sex when they feel good about their bodies. Getting a workout together outside the bedroom has its benefits: not only do you get to see each working up a sweat, but exercising counts as some high-impact quality time. And what better way to motivate and encourage each other to be healthy and feel great?
* Show you care, even when you’re not aroundWhen you’re first dating someone, the little gestures are everything. So why not bring them back? There’s hardly a bigger turn-on than knowing that your partner is thinking about you when you’re not together. Fire off flirty texts, take care of tasks or chores you know your partner dreads, or prepare his/her favorite meal. By the time you actually do make it to the bedroom, things might be too hot to handle.