Love is a mysterious thing. Many people go searching for it, they want it so desperately that they ultimately lose themselves in the quest of finding love. Perhaps one of the most profound lessons one can learn in life is to fall in love with yourself first, in a non-selfish manner.
Self is is something that you can never run out. It is the kind of love that makes you learn self-appreciation. Self-love is essential for allowing real love to fall into place. Unfortunately, loving oneself is easier said than done. After all, love is a very mysterious thing, and not even the best-versed poet can capture its charms. The truth is self-love, much like love for another person, can get ultimately frightening and wonderful at the same time.
# We often think ourselves unworthy of being loved in returnTo love is a great feeling. To be loved in return, that is an even greater feeling. It is ultimately fulfilling to have this love be reciprocated. However, when one feels unworthy of another’s love, the concept of love can be hard to comprehend.
We can never fully allow our partner to love us for who we are, because we ultimately fear something, whether it is being hurt or that the prospect of having another human being in our lives scares us. Finding ourselves unworthy of being loved is a tragedy in itself because, everyone deserves love. It is a far too precious commodity to not be shared.
# We often find ourselves to be lost in self-doubtThe first few months of a relationship are usually filled with feelings of bliss. However, when one has not learned to fully love oneself, one may find themselves continually asking, “Is this what I really want?” or “What am I doing here?”
Self-doubt can cause feelings of disillusionment in the relationship, which will only lead to feelings of discontent and, in a way, awe of what’s happening. When this happens, you feel like you are caught in between here and there, wanting to go another way, but always finding reasons to stay. When you succumb to the doubt of whether or not you can pull through, the odds of pulling through won’t be in your favor.
# It gives you feelings of restlessnessBeing restless in a relationship makes your mind and heart wander. When you find that your heart is restless, you can never really be happy with what you have.
You find yourself constantly questioning the relationship in itself, because you keep wondering if this is what you deserve or if this is what’s good for you or if your partner will stay despite your shortcomings. The concept of having someone love you may be too overwhelming for you, especially when you haven’t learned to accept your own flaws.
# You often feel like your relationship will suddenly endFalling in love is indeed a dangerous thing, because the concept of time is involved. Looking back on experience, I can say that there is no such thing as “forever,” because nothing really lasts.
I would believe in the more real statement, “I love you for as long as you will have me.” Love, like happiness, ultimately becomes a choice, and the so-called “honeymoon period” will eventually die down. When one hasn’t learned to love oneself, there will be the anxious feeling that the relationship will end and you feel like you are hanging by a thread.
# Insecurities will always play a major part of your relationshipLet us all accept this one truth: there will always be someone better than you. For a time, I was plagued with insecurities, but I would eventually come to accept my insecurities. Every day, I am still learning.
Insecurity will always lead you to doubt your partner. You will constantly wonder if your partner is cheating on you, or if they will leave you, or if you will ever be good enough. Remember that there is a lot of beauty in this world, and you are beautiful in your own right. Remember this: your partner chose you.