Figuring out how to flirt on Tinder can be a real balancing act. You probably want to seem cool, calm, and collected. But unlike a face-to-face interaction, you don’t have much time to make a good first impression. This can make it all too easy to come across as an eager beaver. We get it.
But whether you’ve decided to use Tinder to find new flings or to gently break the ice with someone who could be “the one”, your flirting technique is important. So here’s our advice on how to flirt on Tinder like an absolute pro.
# Find one thing that intrigues you about their profile
And honestly, it’s best if it isn’t physical. Even commenting on a t-shirt they’re wearing is more unique than telling them you love their eyes. As you learn how to flirt on Tinder, try to be aware that other people are communicating with your matches too. Who knows, they could be chatting with five other individuals as your message comes along.
Our solution? Find ways to stand out. Notice things that aren’t overly obvious. Give them compliments that they’ll remember. And if you’re going to go for a cheesy Tinder pick-up line, make sure it’s a good one. If not clothes, how about their bio? Even something regarding the location they took their picture in. Think outside the box. They’ll appreciate the effort.
# Avoid all the sexy talk up-front If you’re just looking for a hookup, it makes sense as to why you’d jump right to the point. But, that stuff isn’t super original. Plus, maybe the person you’re chatting with doesn’t want to be seen sexually from the get-go. Or they might feel uncomfortable receiving these advances from someone they don’t know.
When it comes to sexting, we always say to read the room. If it seems like your crush is into your steamy messages, then go for it! But if they aren’t reciprocating? Don’t force it. Avoid being creepy online at all costs. It’s better (and safer) for everyone.
# Figure out how to flirt on Tinder from your matchesSometimes, the best way to learn is through example. Analyze the types of messages you get. Which message made you want to respond? What one-liner made you LOL? And which text made you cringe?
Of course, try not to just copy and paste the same funny message you once received. But do take notes! Analyzing other users’ behavior is a great way to hone your own flirting methods.
# Pay attention to what they’re saying Not only can you learn from paying attention to your matches’ flirting techniques, but it also might make you more attractive! Studies show that knowing how to listen and read your partner’s cues increases your hotness tenfold. By listening to what they have to say and not having rehearsed responses ready, you’re likely setting yourself apart from everyone else too.
Believe it or not, being a great listener isn’t as simple as you may think. Actively listening means paraphrasing, reflecting on your partner’s comments, and resisting the temptation to hijack the conversation. Show them that you genuinely care about what they have to say.
# Still panicking? Don’t worry, remember to relaxDoes your stomach do somersaults every time you message a match? If so, take a deep breath. Sure, great flirting takes confidence. But that doesn’t mean that if you put a foot wrong or make a typo you should feel embarrassed. If anything, making a mistake or blurting out a joke will show your match you’re human! And probably put them at ease too.
Don’t be afraid to show your silly side. Have fun with emojis. Get playful with your words! Remember, most people on this app are sending a boring “how r u”. So don’t let self-doubt get the better of you. There’s no need to overcomplicate. You can do this. Getting great at online flirting can take some practice. But it’s definitely achievable. So take a deep breath and be yourself.