6 Tips To Help You Handle Jealousy in a Poly Relationship

Being in a poly relationship, contrary to popular belief, is actually a lot like being in a monogamous relationship. It’s just that instead of only two people being committed to each other, there are more people committed to making a single relationship work.

There are a lot of people who definitely don’t want to be in a polygamous relationship. However, there are many who opt to live a life with multiple partners instead of just one. Many people even believe that humans aren’t meant to be monogamous and those people definitely have reason to believe that.

As you can imagine, we also remain monogamous because we have a very strong feeling of possessiveness. What’s ours is ours, and nobody else can have it. This can form a lot of jealousy, and just because people choose to be in a relationship with more than one person, it’s not because they don’t feel jealousy.

# Communication is first

The key to any relationship is to communicate – but this is even more important in a poly relationship. When everyone needs to get attention and make sure they’re getting their time with each other, you have to communicate in order to prevent jealousy.

Not only that, but when jealousy does become a factor, communication can help clear the air. You have to first talk about your issues before they can be resolved. Making sure everyone is aware of the issue is the first step.

# Everyone has to get along

There’s a reason poly relationships work out so well. Everyone has to get along before agreeing to enter the relationships. Everyone has to be able to communicate and care about one another before even getting into the relationship.

So, when jealousy is present in the relationship, it’s easier for them to talk about it and come to a conclusion. If they didn’t all get along, it would make things that much more difficult. And while jealousy seems like it has to do with other people, it’s more to do with the person who is jealous than anyone else.

# It has to be acknowledged

When you’re in a polyamorous relationship, you can’t just let your emotions get bottled up. Imagine if everyone was harboring toxic emotions and never letting them out until they just couldn’t take it anymore?

The truth is that you have to acknowledge the jealousy. You can’t just ignore if one person is acting jealous. In a poly relationship, it’ll only work and be successful if all emotions are acknowledged and validated.

# Lashing out at another person is avoided

I can’t say that this never happens, but the only way poly relationships become successful is when nobody lashes out and freaks out on another because they’re jealous. Instead of doing this, they confront each other maturely to discuss it.

If everyone who was unhappy just started yelling at one another, there would be a never-ending argument within the relationship. Nobody wants a relationship that is plagued with fights.

# The bigger issue is focused on

Jealousy usually isn’t the only thing going on in a relationship. If there’s jealousy, there are often many other issues going on. The reason a poly relationship can be successful despite the jealousy is because they solve the root of the problem.

Everyone looks at that jealousy, and then at their own actions. They consider that maybe there’s something more going on to cause the jealousy, and they work on fixing that problem first.

# Validation is given to all parties

Another reason polyamorous relationships work even if there is jealousy present is that they all work hard to make sure everyone is feeling loved and appreciated. Everyone chips in and validates each other. They make sure that their needs are met, and this not only gets rid of jealousy, it prevents it altogether.