Being a single mother is becoming a worldwide norm, and we have famous successful single mothers in Hollywood like Halle Berry, Katie Holmes and Angelina Jolie and in in Bollywood moms like Sushmita Sen and Ekta Kapoor are showing the way through their inspirational stories.
There are single fathers too these days through adoption, surrogacy, divorce and death of a spouse but their percentage is still less. In the single mother vs single father statistics, it’s the moms who win thumbs down.
Approximately 80 per cent of single parents are women, and single fathers run the rest 9 to 25 per cent homes.
So there is no denying the fact that being a single mom brings with it a set of struggles. From surviving alone financially to being the emotional anchor to the children, it’s a supremely difficult task that women have to be at 24×7.
# The child’s contribution really matters
As mothers, we always tend to do things for our children. They might feel like having breakfast in bed, and we tend to pamper them out of love, never thinking of the detrimental effects in the long-run.
How to be a successful single mother with no help? Single mothers should make the child realize that moms have a lot on their hands, be it at home or at work. Since they are doing everything alone a little help from their kids is very important.
# Harp on the importance of moneyYou can be a successful single mother if you can make your child understand that your financial independence comes with a lot of hard work. Single mothers are often struggling financially and they should teach their children to value money.
The money that is earned cannot be thrown around just like that. If you can make your child respect the paycheck that runs the household, half of your job is done.
# Have social bindingsBeing a single mother does not mean surviving like an island. A single mother needs to have close connections with friends and relatives so that a child learns the value of relationships and social bonding.
Unless living in an extended family with grandparents, children growing up with single moms don’t get to see the bonding between parents.
So it is essential to cultivate relationships beyond the immediate family of two and involve the child in these relationships by organizing social meets and playdates.
# Create boundaries with your childrenBoundaries are essential in every relationship. Be it an intimate relationship between two partners, relationship with in-laws or with friends, boundaries go a long way in ensuring relationships stay healthy.
Discover the power of saying “no” and children could be manipulative and could arm-twist you by throwing tantrums, and you need to know how not to budge.
If you can establish boundaries with your children then instead of constantly coaxing and cajoling you for favours they would know from the start where to draw the line.
# Keep a tab on your childWe are not telling you to indulge in helicopter parenting, but it does help if you can keep track of who your child is meeting online and in real life as well, the family of friends they are interacting with closely and what they are up to in school?
Many parents complained that their children became gaming freaks or got involved with friends who were into drugs. If you keep a tab, you can nip the issues in the bud. Single moms are good at this – that’s what you call smart parenting.
# Have a scheduleChildren function best within a schedule. Since you are a single mother, you have to take extra care to keep the schedule in place.
If it goes haywire, you will have to do double the work to put it back in order. As a single parent juggling, work, home and children schedules are very difficult, and you might just feel like letting them watch TV way beyond bedtime so that you can also unwind on the couch for some time.