6 Ways To Ease The Pain When You Miss Someone

Is there anything worse than when the person you love more than yourself isn’t in love with you anymore? Breaking up is never an easy situation, not even when you are the one to end it. When someone else pulls the trigger, it makes it that much more excruciating. There are ways to wallow in your own pity party, and there are things that help get you past the hurt hump. It is all about knowing what to do when you miss someone.

Missing someone is a mindset. Often, we make ourselves miserable by holding onto the loss. The key to stop missing someone is to distance the feelings and put them on hold. It’s easier said than done and it takes time, but you can do it.

# When the thoughts creep in, push them away

It is natural for loss to creep in and ruin just about any moment you have, but only if you allow it.

Once you start to think about the person you miss, which you inevitably will, disallow the memories the ability to overcome you. As quick as they fly in your face, push them away and make a commitment not to honor them.

# Force yourself to try new experiences

The best way to let go of the past is to move on with the future. By performing the same old habits and living in groundhog day, you keep yourself stuck in a rut. If you mix things up a bit, then you change patterns in your life that may be keeping you miserable.

Patterns are ways our brains get stalled into making assumptions and assuming we know things about the future that we don’t. If you overhaul your life to include new things and experiences, they overshadow the habits that keep you from healing.

# Stop talking yourself out of moving on

When you end a relationship, it is human nature to feel some allegiance to it. If you forget about it too quickly, there can be guilt and remorse at not grieving it too much.

Stop convincing yourself that it isn’t time to move on just yet. There is no magic timeline to start to live again. If you feel it is right, don’t let anyone tell you it is too soon to start over, especially not you.

# Realize that you aren’t going to solve loss through reason

The problem with loss is that we have a tendency to try to make sense of it. There is no sense to love. Even the best psychologists and scientists can’t explain why we love who we love, or how we fall in or out of love.

It is nothing more than a mystery. Trying to reason through it to figure out what went wrong only leaves you endlessly searching for something that isn’t there and stops you from moving on and finding someone to fill the hole.

# Stop allowing triggers to get the best of you

Triggers are emotional hot buttons that catapult us back into hurt long after we’ve moved on. We all have emotional triggers from our childhood, past relationships, and any hurt we experience.

If you know that something is a trigger and elicits a backslide to your healing, then make a special note of it. Make sure never to put yourself in the position to let that trigger go off again. In time, emotional triggers hurt less and less. But, while still fresh, they are very destructive to whatever progress you make.

# Stop the negative thought cycle

Constantly trying to go over what went wrong will do nothing but bring up negative thoughts of your breakup and loss.

Rehashing the situation never gives you the answers you need, it only brings back the negative ending of your relationship. Negativity does nothing but hurt you emotionally. It keeps you stuck in a cycle of hurt, so stop dragging yourself back in.