Learning how to get the power back in a relationship isn’t something that happens overnight. It takes a lot of time and patience. You also need to understand that maybe power isn’t everything. Sometimes you need to pick your battles, my love.
A good example of a time when it may be necessary to take back the power in a relationship is when your partner uses it to their advantage. If you partner believes they have power and control over you, it may be time to walk away.
However, if you aren’t ready to do so, you may just need to learn how to get the power back in a relationship, and I’m here to help you do just that.
A lot of us like to assume that we wear the pants in the relationship, which basically means that you are in control. But are you really? And more on that, is it really that great to be in control? Aren’t relationships supposed to be about compromise and an equal partnership? No? Oh. Ok. Well, I suppose you’re right. Sometimes it is important that we get the power back in the relationship–every now and again.
# Consider why power is important to youYeah, before we start on this journey, let us do some soul searching, shall we? Why do you even care? Like I said earlier, power isn’t everything.
However, there are specific circumstances when you want to stay in a relationship and make it work, but you need to have more control over the relationship. That’s what you need to determine next.
# Should I stay or should I go? While you’re already soul searching, consider this: Is it worth staying in this relationship, or is it time to walk away? I’ve been in a handful of relationships that were genuinely toxic and unhealthy. My partner believed that he needed to control me. I know you don’t actually know me, but let me tell you–I’m not easily controlled, nor am I meant to be controlled.
Seriously though, it is important that you really take your time to consider whether or not this relationship is even worth the work to take back the power. Or should walk away now while you still have your sanity?
# The real step 1
Okay, so now that we’ve established that you want to do this thing, it’s time to actually get into the nitty gritty of it. Time to make a plan and understand how to get the power back in a relationship.
First things first, stand the heck up for yourself. If you are hoping to take back the power in your relationship, it’s a safe bet that your partner is misusing their power to their advantage and to your disadvantage. Perhaps they have begun to mistreat you or make you feel like a shell of a human being.
It is time to stand up for yourself. Warning: It’s going to freak them out. You need to understand that they aren’t expecting you to suddenly develop a backbone and take charge, yet here you are.
# Be kindListen, you can easily take back the power in your relationship while still remaining a decent human being. No need to throw shade or make your partner feel inferior to you just because you are climbing that power ladder straight to the top. Kill them with kindness, as they say. After all, if you are in an active romantic relationship with this person, you do want to show them love and kindness. Oh, and power too.
# Confidence is key
Stand taller than you ever have before and watch as they quiver. Honestly, it’s possible that they’ve been waiting and praying for this day to come. Perhaps they hate having the power in your relationship. They’ve been waiting for the day that you stand up and take it. It’s a lot of work being in power, so maybe they are ready to pass off the torch to you. The metaphorical power torch, that is.
Stay confident and believe in yourself, because that is when power will truly switch hands. Power loves confidence.
# Don’t take no for an answerOkay, maybe that sounded terrible–but hear me out. One time when my boyfriend and I started dating, he sent me a text while I was out with my dad that said “Movies tonight, me and you, 8:00.” That was it. Something so simple, but it totally intrigued me. He was so demanding and powerful about it.
There’s no way you can say no to something like that, especially when they are a genuinely kind person. So, make sure you pair #4 with #6, always and forever.