Some people just get along better with members of the opposite sex. Perhaps you’re a women who has simply got along with boys better. Maybe you’re a guy and always connected with girls more easily because your family was full of females. Whatever the reason, friendships and gender don’t have to be segregated especially if you follow the rules of opposite gender friendships.
The problem is, many people believe that men and women can’t be friends without the lines becoming a little blurry and one person developing feelings for the other. Some think sex will always enter the equation and screw everything up.
# Keep everything strictly platonicIf you’re getting ready to go out and you find yourself wondering what your friend will think of your outfit – first, stop and check with yourself for a moment. Every interaction between you two should be totally platonic. There should be no thought about them in any other way.
# Keep an eye out for developing feelingsHow would you feel if your friend suddenly found a partner and started a close relationship? Would you be happy for them or would you become a little jealous? That’s something you need to watch out for!
If you develop any type of romantic or sexual feeling towards your friend, take a step back and examine exactly what is going on. If one side of the friendship harbors attraction and the other one doesn’t, it can not only be hurtful for the one with feelings. But it can be the beginning of the end of the friendship.
# Respect each other’s feelings at all times
One of the most important rules of any friendship, opposite gender or otherwise, is to always respect the feelings of your friend. And it is even more important in opposite gender friendships.
Men and women sometimes don’t see things the same way. They might speak out of turn and not realize it, or be a little insensitive without knowing, but by always respecting your friend’s feelings, you’ll side-step any issues.
This is definitely one of the rules of opposite gender friendships you should keep at the forefront of your mind at all times, if you want your friendship to last.
# Nothing you say, do, or think should be a secret to anyone around youIf you’re keeping secrets between you, away from anyone else in your lives, why is that? Is it because you’re doing something that doesn’t fit in with the description of ‘just friends’?
This is even more damaging if one of you has a partner, or perhaps both of you have partners. Friends shouldn’t sneak around or hide things from other people in their lives.
# Know your boundaries and make sure you talk about themSame gender friendships have boundaries. But opposite gender friendships have more. There is always the risk of sexual tension building up or feelings developing. It’s basic biology in some cases.
If you have boundaries within your friendship, you establish them and communicate them to one another. One of the main rules of opposite gender friendships is that you communicate and talk things through. Your friendship will flourish if you do this.
# Make sure your partner has met your friend and feels comfortable with themIf you have a partner, or if your friend has a partner, you should all meet and spend time together. It’s no good if you spend time together as friends and never include your partners.
While this doesn’t have to be all the time, occasionally is a good thing. This shows your partner, or their partner, there is nothing to hide. And nothing is going on, and you really do have a platonic, innocent friendship. Helping your partner understand your friendship will make your life far easier.
# Never allow things to become sexualNumber one in the rules of opposite gender friendships? Never let things become sexual. Sex has a way of complicating things and making everything difficult.
If you allow sex to creep into the equation, you’ll quickly notice that your friendship becomes awkward and the lines become blurry. Some friends can navigate the friends with benefits thing easily, but most can’t. It’s best to keep your pants on!