I know we’ve all done this before. Taking someone for granted is just a human flaw. However, it’s a flaw we should all strive to correct. You never know just how much you can negatively affect someone when you don’t appreciate what they do for you.
This isn’t just true in romantic relationships, either. Although that’s where it’s seen most, any close relationship you have can be completely ruined if you don’t appreciate them. They can be drastically affected by your dismissal of the things they do for you and it can have a lasting impact.
Thanks to this world’s lack of time travel, once something is done, you can’t take it back. There’s no way for you to go back and undo everything. That’s why you really have to be aware of how you’re treating those closest to you.
If you’re not careful, your lack of appreciation can leave lasting effects on someone you really care about. Here’s how you taking someone for granted can permanently hurt them.
# They grow resentfulAnd they should. When someone gives and gives and gives and gets nothing in return, it makes them bitter. They start asking why they’re even doing anything nice for you at all. They’ll grow unhappy.
And where do all of those negative feelings begin? With you. Therefore they’ll start growing resentful of you and having you in their life. Resentful behavior can lead to a whole host of issues all on its own, too.
# They stop trusting youWhy should they trust someone who causes them so much unhappiness, someone who doesn’t do anything nice for them? When you’re very close to someone, there are certain expectations that need to be met.
You need to be there for them when they need someone to talk to. You have to reach out and genuinely care about their lives. If you’re not doing any of the things a real friend, family member, or partner should, the other person loses trust in you. They can’t count on you. And therefore, they’ll end up having trouble trusting new people, too.
# Their self-worth plummetsIf there’s one thing to take away from this, it’s that taking someone for granted makes them feel like they’re worth less than they are. They start to feel devalued. That’s because you’re not valuing them.
How can someone feel as though they’re valued when you do nothing to show them that? When someone’s self-worth drops, so does their self-esteem and their happiness.
# You grow apart significantlyIf you’re not prepared to lose someone for good, stop taking them for granted. You need to appreciate those who put an effort into making your relationship work.
If they’re the only person trying and doing things for you, they’ll realize that. And when they see how little you seem to care, they’ll stop reaching out and you’ll just grow apart.
# They’ll only remember the fact that you took them for grantedOut of everything they could remember about you 20 years from now, what do you want them to think about? How funny you were? How great of a friend you were?
Well, taking someone for granted only produces one memory that stands out above the rest: that you never appreciated them. That’s really the main thing they’ll remember when looking back on your relationship. Not all the great times you had, but how much they gave and didn’t get back.
# They feel like they don’t contribute to the relationship
This is probably one of the most harmful things that happens when you take someone for granted.
People like to feel as though they’re making a difference. They like to feel useful. When you don’t appreciate anything they do, they never get that feeling. Instead, they feel useless.
# They become insecureBecause of everything they give and don’t get, they become insecure. It makes them feel like they aren’t worth the praise when you never thank them or appreciate their effort. This results in them feeling down about themselves because it’s like they never do anything right.
Even though they are. You have to show your appreciation for what people do so they can feel validated. You want to make sure they know how much you like what they do for you. That praise can actually make a huge difference.