Author Robert A. Heinlein once wrote, “Love is that condition in which the happiness of another person is essential to your own.”
This quote rings loud and clear to couples all over the world. Whether you have been together for 40 years or 40 minutes, being able to prop your partner up and make them smile during hard times is an unmistakable challenge worth undergoing to become stronger. Only when a couple goes through hardship will the players be able to tell if it’s worth sticking it out and working at it.
Forgiveness is a big factor when it comes to relationships. Patience, kindness, and understanding, too, play a huge role in keeping relationships strong. This may seem very cliché, and you may have heard advice like this thousands of times before, but there’s plenty of truth to it. You may not be able to control who you fall in love with, but you certainly can control how you go about loving this person in times of sadness and trouble.
# Financial issues
Dealing with money troubles is a surefire way for you to gauge how strong your relationship is. Many people run for the hills when their partner is faced with financial ruin. However, if you and your partner can stick together and get rid of the financial burden as a team, it will undoubtedly make your bond stronger than ever.
# InfidelityInfidelity is not an issue to be toyed with. Breaking trust and scoffing in loyalty’s face are two issues many people will not tolerate. According to a survey conducted by MSN, “Cheating plays a significant role in divorce. It is the third most common reason cited in the survey, with 55% of respondents saying infidelity caused their split.”
If you can forgive your partner for straying, there’s no denying that both of you will work harder to fix things. This, in turn, will help your relationship become a stronger one.
# Job lossWhen my partner was laid off, it felt like our whole world was crumbling down on us. My single salary wasn’t enough to maintain the lifestyle we lived, and we had to make plenty of hard choices… one of which was moving to a smaller place. The challenges that we faced during those trying months somehow worked out in our favor.
We now know that if we stick together and persevere, we can make it work–no matter what. Money may make the world go round, but it certainly wasn’t the main factor in our relationship. Not only did we learn about the importance of saving up for monsoon season because saving for a rainy day just didn’t cut it, we also learned that you can overcome anything if you have the right support and mentality in place.
# Temporary separation
Some people look at this as a flailing step that couples take before divorce, but on the contrary, a separation may just mend the problems you’re facing. The goal of a separation is, of course, to give one another the time and space to sort things out.
Whether it’s rebuilding trust, focusing on yourself, or just taking time to figure out what you want, there’s no denying that choosing to undergo a temporary separation may work out great for you. This is because if you choose to get back together, you will appreciate how miserable you were apart and will realize you can overcome anything–if you want to.
Of course, you have to set some ground rules before committing to a separation. Examples include: no sleeping around, figuring out a timeframe, who gets the kids and when, and so on. These rules are determined by both of you, so think them through before implementing them.
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InfertilityNot all couples who deal with infertility make it out unscathed. Blame, pain, hurt, grief, and loss are common emotions felt during this journey, and not everyone can learn to become a cohesive couple again.
However, there are others that emerge stronger than ever. I know a wonderful couple who tried to have a baby for 8 years, to no avail. After numerous tests, hormonal therapies, and several attempts at IVF, they gave up and opted to be a child-free couple.
When I asked someone how infertility affected her marriage, she said, It has made us stronger than ever. I now know what a wonderful man I married, and I would not have been able to go through this pain without him. He’s my rock, and he singlehandedly lifted me up when I didn’t want to live anymore.