Are you struggling to deal with being the only single friend in your group? Been there. It can be a lonely place to be, but I can help.
It is one thing to deal with being single when you don’t want to be. But it is a whole other battle being the only single friend in your group.
Complaining about online dating or being ghosted doesn’t feel as relieving when your friends can’t complain with you. Although your taken friends are probably great, feeling like you’re the only person left in your friend group who isn’t matched up can feel incredibly lonely.
There is a lot you can do to deal with being the only single friend. Beyond trying not to be single, you can find the good in this time of your life. Make the most of it. Although you may want to be in a happy relationship, it doesn’t mean you have to be miserable until then.
# Perfect your alone timeEven the happiest relationships can get tense when you spend a ton of time together. While you have the time, make it for yourself. Do all the stuff you like. Eat smelly food. Wear those comfy sweats with holes. Watch garbage TV.
These can sound like sad single person things, but they’re awesome things that you get to enjoy. Just because the monogamy-centered world sees singleness as a failure doesn’t mean you have to. The whole thing about doing this stuff alone is that it doesn’t matter what anyone else thinks because they’re not with you. You get to enjoy your time with you.
# Be selfish
Going to dinner with your partner’s coworkers? I don’t think so. You don’t have to compromise on the ballet, dinner with the in-laws, or work parties. You can say no to any event. You can put yourself first always. This may sound conceited, but it isn’t. Spend that time on you. Take a bunch of selfies.
# Date aroundCasual dating is super underrated. Sure it comes with some faults, but you also get to experience so many new things. You get to meet new people and do things your coupled-up friends probably don’t.
Enjoy the elements of dating that don’t include commitment. Having fun without expectation is something so many people dread, but it can be a lot of fun.
# Make single friendsI know that making friends as an adult is hard. How do you meet people when you’re an adult? Well, the same way you did as a kid. You may not have school but you have work. Talk to your coworkers in the break room.
If that’s not an option, do activities. Join a gym, take some exercise classes, or even find Facebook groups that discuss topics you’re interested in. I know online dating has been normalized but there is no shame in finding friends online too. You can even find groups dedicated to singles.
# IndulgeWhen you’re in a relationship, unless you’re a millionaire, you usually discuss big purchases but as a single person, you don’t need permission or even a discussion. You can splurge on spa treatments, weird kitchen gadgets, or anything else.
You get to put your money where you want to. The fun thing is that when you’re single, people expect you to be less responsible. For some reason, relationships and responsibility go hand-in-hand. When you’re single, people expect you to be more spontaneous so it is less likely you’ll be judged for spending a little carelessly.
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Share your experiences
Not only do you get the experiences of being single but you get to share all of that with your friends. Online dating horror stories or great first date, you get to give all the juicy details to your friends. And trust me, they will love it. They may be happy in their relationships, but they live for your single-person stories.
# Observe your friendsWatching everyone around you in a relationship seems lonely on the surface, but you get the inside scoop. Not only do you hear all the gossip, but you see how they interact. Which of these couples seem to work and which don’t?
You can learn from their mistakes. You get to be happy for them while learning from their experiences. This prepares you for when that time comes, and you’re no longer the only single friend.