In today’s world, saying something is no longer good enough, especially if you’ve said it countless times before. As that cheesy Extreme song goes, “More than words to show you feel, that your love for me is real.”
Let me tell you a little tale that took place several years ago. I’m the kind of person who constantly quips “I love you” for everything and anything. I end messages with XOXO and I say “I love you” to almost anyone I come into contact with. Everyone from my fiancé to my regular delivery lady has been at the receiving end of my “I love you” spiels.
My fiancé isn’t the jealous type, but all my “I love you” professions made him think that I didn’t truly mean it every time I said it to him. I, on the other hand, constantly berated him for always leaving me hanging and for not saying it enough.
One day, he took me by the hand, looked me in the eye and said, “Honey, if you overuse it, it loses its meaning.” He then went into this whole thing about supply and demand that left me reeling, and although I scoffed at him, it got me thinking long and hard about the true meaning of “I love you.” That’s when I decided that saying it wasn’t going to cut it, and I had to show it. That’s just what I did and our relationship is now stronger than ever.
Love isn’t just one grand gesture that gets you high for days on end. It’s the little, seemingly inconsequential things that build up and create a loving atmosphere. If you want to show your partner how much you love them and appreciate having them in your life, here are 7 ways you can do that.
# Touch moreDon’t turn your nose up at public displays of affection. Sometimes, a little PDA is all that your lover needs to know for sure that you love them. Holding hands, slinging your arm around them, kissing and hugging are all wonderful expressions of love. Don’t just save it for public excursions, either. The sweetest forms of affection take place behind closed doors, so don’t be shy to get touchy feely with your partner.
# Laugh and playDon’t be serious and uptight all the time. Sure, it may just be who you are, but there’s no reason why you should forgo laughing and playing with your partner on a regular basis. The whole point of being in a relationship is to be able to do silly things together and be as expressive as you want.
Playtime is very important, and I don’t just mean between the sheets. Turn everyday chores into something fun. You could play hide and seek at the grocery store, tag team on cleaning days and get into irrelevant yet super fun tickle fights. It doesn’t matter what you categorize as fun, but so long as you can do it and make your partner smile in the process, your job is done. Remember that you’re never too “adult” to indulge in playtime with your lover.
# Give gifts
Everyone loves gifts, and your partner is no different. You don’t have to head out to Tiffany’s and overpay for bling bling, although that won’t hurt one bit. But you can also spend a dollar on the gift, so long as it’s meaningful.
Most of the time, the sweetest gifts are the ones that cost nothing, so if you have the time to make something with your own two hands, go for it. Whether it’s a pressed flower bookmark or a playlist of your favorite tunes, it’s really the thought that counts. You can also give your lover experiences like a holiday, scuba diving course, power boat license, or anything else that you think they’d enjoy.
# Send love notes. Instead of verbally expressing your love, put it down on paper, or e-paper for that matterFrom post-its to memes, there are countless ways for you to show your appreciation in love. I, for one, always leave little surprise notes in my fiancé’s suitcase every time he has to go off on a business trip.
You’ll be surprised at just how meaningful these little scraps of paper can be to someone who is homesick and missing their lover. It reminds them that no matter how far away they are, they have someone waiting for them at home.
# Pay attentionAnother way to show your appreciation in love is to always pay attention to what they say and do. Some people are less expressive than others, and if your sweetheart is like this, you have to learn to read between the lines.
They may not always show and express just how stressed, tired or upset they are, so it’s your job to figure it out. For example, I had no idea just how much pressure my fiancé was under at work, until his colleague blabbed it to me when I ran into him at a café. It hit me hard, and I felt so guilty for not paying attention to the little signs that my lover was sending out on a daily basis. I learned to focus, and I can confidently say that listening and paying attention are very important when it comes to showing appreciation in love.
# Give thanksShow appreciation to your lover by being grateful, and be sure that you verbalize it every time. Even the little things deserve recognition. From making dinner to taking out the trash, be thankful that your partner does these things, not because it’s expected of them, but because they want to do it.
# Plan surprisesAh, the power of surprises. Everyone loves a good surprise, so why not make the effort to plan a little something for your sweetheart? From the big stuff like organizing a getaway, to surprising them with dinner reservations at their favorite ribs joint, make the effort to be lovingly adorable.
Even the simple stuff counts as a surprise. Stuff like setting up a candlelit bubble bath for your girlfriend after she gets home from a long day at work to treating your husband to a sexy oil massage, don’t underestimate the power of these surprise gestures.