Fantasize about cheating? Oh boy, well, I can’t say I’ve never had those thoughts before. When I was in a relationship I wasn’t sure about, thinking about other people would happen. I spent most of my time trying to convince myself that those thoughts were meaningless and that I liked the partner I was with. But I didn’t really like him. Obviously, not enough or else I wouldn’t have had those thoughts.
With time, I ended up breaking up with him because I figured if I’m having those thoughts, he’s not the one for me. But sometimes the answer isn’t so cut and dry. When it comes to fantasies, they can be tricky, and when those fantasies involve cheating, it’s even tricker.
But, your fantasies aren’t without reason. Whatever your fantasies are about, whether you dream of puppies or sky diving, they all have a subconscious root in your mind. And though you may be thinking, oh no, that’s not a bad thing at all!
# You’re not the only oneFirst of all, you’re not the only one who’s fantasizing about cheating. That’s right. According to the Journal of Sexual Medicine, fantasizing about having sex with someone who’s not your partner is one of the top fantasies for men and women. Yeah, I was just as surprised as you are right now when I found that out.
# You’re scared of commitmentAh, yes. The old “scared of commitment” fear. Who isn’t scared of commitment? Everyone has those moments where they think to themselves, should I do this?
If you’re someone who struggles with settling down with one person, then this is probably why you have these fantasies. Even if you really like this person, fear of commitment always has a way to weaseling itself in.
# You went into a relationship too fastYou jumped into the relationship too quickly, and now you’re feeling a little stuck. Well, you should know you can always get out of the relationship. But, understandably, right now, you’re not sure what to do. When you rush into things, it’s easy to feel overwhelmed, and that’s when the fantasies pop up.
# You’re not sure if monogamy is for youNot everyone is meant to be in monogamous relationships, at least not at every moment in their lives. And maybe that’s the case for you. You’re not sure if you want to be monogamous right now, and now those feelings turn into how you fantasize about cheating.
# You’re sexually unfulfilledBefore, the sex with your partner was amazing; it blew your mind. But now, things are a little boring. You’re not getting turned on by your partner anymore and feel sexually unfulfilled.
Well, that is a great moment for you to have thoughts about someone else. It’s not great, but the timing matches up perfectly. Ask yourself if you’re sexually fulfilled in your relationship.
# Something is upsetting youMaybe you just had a fight with your partner, or they said something that hurt you. Instead of talking about your feelings, they stayed inside of you and developed into something else. When you fantasize about cheating, it’s often when you have unresolved feelings with your partner. Is there something on your mind? You should say it.
# You’re not happy in your relationshipYou aren’t getting along, the love is long gone, and you’re both in the relationship for convenience. It’s a tough situation, and if you’re experiencing this, then it’s a solid reason why you’re thinking about other people. You’re no longer being fulfilled by your partner, so you fantasize about cheating.
# You’re in a longterm relationshipWhat can I say; it happens to the best of us? You’ve been with your partner for years, and naturally, the relationship can hit stale moments. You’ve only slept with your partner, and maybe the sex is getting a little dull.
And in those moments, it’s normal for people to fantasize about other things than their partner. What this means is you need to spice things up.