As a woman and a lover, one of the things you take upon yourself is to change your man for the better. You see his flaws and his imperfections, and you want to help him improve upon them. After all, many men are diamonds in the rough that need a bit of polishing to become better versions of themselves *right?*. But, when you do this, you need to make sure you don’t accidentally emasculate your man in the process!
When you’re in a relationship, isn’t it each partner’s selfless love that helps their partner become the best they can be? That’s true to a degree, but you have to remember that if you go too far, you risk changing him beyond all recognition. That’s not the aim, is it?
Let him be who he is, but help him smooth out those rough edges in time. Don’t make him feel guilty for his character and his flaws – we all have them!
# You take overDon’t push him aside and take over a conversation or an argument, especially because you believe he’s not arguing his case well enough. The fact that you intervened will make him believe you think he can’t stand up for himself.
#. You brag about your historyDo you brag now and then about your sexual history or his inexperience with life just to put him down? Knowing full well that he can’t compete with you?
Sex is a big part of a man’s mind. And if he knows he’s not as experienced as you, he’ll just want to go out there and notch a few more to feel man enough again. [Read: The right way to talk about past relationships with your current partner]
# Scoff at his salaryA guy subconsciously feels like the hunter and the provider in the relationship. Scoffing at the one thing society’s convinced him is his role, i.e. earning money for the family, will definitely make him feel like he’s less of a man.
# Tell him he’s a wimpDon’t call your man a coward just because he couldn’t confront someone or deal with a situation. Instead, reason with him and talk about what the better action could have been. Be sure to empathize with him at the same time.
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Compare him to other men in a bad lightNo guy likes
being compared negatively to another guy, especially by his own
girlfriend or wife. Just don’t do it! It’s disrespectful and if he did
the same thing to you, you’d be enraged and extremely upset.
# You emasculate your man when you talk about his flawsIf
there are flaws you need to confront, talk about them in private, and
never in front of anyone else. Talking about his weaknesses in front of
others will anger him and make him withdraw from you emotionally.
# You say “I knew you wouldn’t be able to do it”
Hearing this line from a woman he loves feels like a painful low blow on his crotch. And the worst part is that he can’t even argue the case himself because he’s failed in your eyes.
# You stare at the ceiling when he’s on top of youYou really can’t blame yourself if you don’t enjoy having sex with him. But if he stares into your eyes while both of you are locked in a passionate embrace and he sees you staring at the ceiling or yawning like you’re bored, his member will shrivel into a raisin in no time. The same goes for faking it and getting caught too!