Introverts and extroverts; two opposing lifestyles, personalities, and even dating styles. Can these two polar opposites date? Can an introvert date an extrovert and make it work in the long run?
The answer is a simple yes. I know it may seem counterintuitive but an introvert can date an extrovert and do it happily. But, just like any other healthy relationship, it requires a bit of understanding, a lot of respect, and of course, compromise.Although introvert and extrovert relationships have a great chance at lasting, they do need a bit more tenderness than other relationships when it comes to communication.
Because you and your partner may not react the same to crowds, energies, or events you need to be able to share how you are feeling verbally. You also have to be willing to make sacrifices for each other and know when you both need to recharge in your own ways.
# Express yourself and your needs
Every relationship needs open and honest communication but an introvert and extrovert relationship even more so. If you can’t communicate what you need from your partner they won’t know, especially because they may need the opposite of what you do.
Tell your partner if you need a night by yourself and explain why. And try to understand that they need a night out with friends. Trust will only come from talking and listening.
# Compromise
Introverts and extroverts know what makes them comfortable. For you, the perfect date night may be renting a movie and cuddling on the couch while your partner may prefer to be out in a group at a club. Instead of avoiding what you both prefer, try to compromise.
Go out with your partner even if it is just for an hour before you call it a night. That will show them you’re trying and they will appreciate that just as you would if they stay in and watch a movie with you on a Saturday night.
# Don’t box each other in
Just because your partner is an extrovert, it doesn’t mean they have to go out every night and prefer going out to staying in with you. Just as you being an introvert doesn’t mean you never want to go out or try new things. You are both layered and can change your mind or be in a more social or low-key mood.
Realize that just because your partner is an extrovert that doesn’t mean they don’t also need alone time just as you may need some time to go out with your friends.
# Branch out of your comfort zone
Sometimes. This is part of compromising. You don’t need to go out every weekend because your partner does and they don’t need to stay in every weekend because you do. But pushing yourself a bit not just to please them but to bond is important.
Sometimes you’ll hate going out and be eager to get home, but sometimes you may really enjoy yourself. Like I said, this doesn’t have to happen every week, but when there is an event that is important to your partner and you know they would love having you at their side, try to go.
# Focus on rebuilding your energies
If you’re wondering can an introvert date an extrovert, you need to keep in mind that energies are a major part of being an introvert or extrovert. You may need a weekend at home watching Netflix to recover from a dinner out with friends while your partner gets their energy from being out in a loud environment.
You should know how your partner recharges and they should know how you do. This will give you clarity when you are apart. You don’t want to assume your partner doesn’t want to be around you just because they need a night out just as you don’t want them to think you’ve lost interest because you would rather be alone for the night.
# Don’t push each otherIt is nice when your partner does something out of their comfort zone for you, but don’t push them. Just as you wouldn’t want them pushing you to go to a rave when you know you would feel anxious and tired so quickly.
It may seem like the simplest thing to ask your partner to relax at home with you but too many nights at home can be detrimental to an extrovert’s mental health as too many nights out could exhaust an introvert physically and emotionally. Let your partner say no sometimes.
# Help them understand what alone time means to you
An introvert’s alone time is vital to their well being. You know how good it feels to do nothing but lay in bed and veg out sometimes, but your partner may view that as boring.
Help them understand what that does for you. Explain to them how you feel after a relaxing night in and how it will help you branch out on other nights.
# Understand what socializing means to themThe same way you want your extrovert partner to understand your side, you need to listen and understand their side. Going to a loud bar may seem like hell to you but it could be your partner’s happy place. Listen to them.
Try to wrap your head around the fact that your partner thrives off a crowd and being around other people and socializing. It doesn’t mean they like others more than you or prefer their company to yours. It just means they need that time to feel their best.