I’ve had my fair share of experiences with mean people, but there’s one girl whom I’ll never forget. Let’s call her Ava. She is particularly spiteful and extremely manipulative. Ava is well known for being positive and happy-go-lucky, but because I’ve known her for over a decade, I know that it’s all a facade. Behind closed doors, she is the devil incarnate. She bitches about everything, badmouths everyone, and even puts down little kids. Seriously, who compares their art to a 7-year-old’s?
Let’s not even get started on her social media accounts. Her pictures and posts go on forever and somehow, they’re always filled with I’m-so-awesome content. To an outsider, everything’s rainbows and peaches, but to the rare few in the know, Ava is bullshitting the world. Why? One can only assume that it has to do with self esteem issues—but hey, I’m no psychologist, just a friend who’s sick and tired of dealing with the brunt of her attitude.
# They only hang out with you for a reasonUnlike real friends, mean people only want to be around you for something other than the pleasure of your company. It could be that you just got a convertible and they need a ride to school. It could be that they’re dry on herb and want you to smoke them up. No matter what, if you take away the reasons for them wanting to be around you, there’s a chance you’ll never hear from them again.
# Lies and exaggerations
Mean people dabble in lies and, somehow, are masters at exaggerating. They always try to elevate themselves far above everyone else. They love I’m-better-than-you topics, and when they share stories, it always involves them doing something amazing, even if you know that it wasn’t the case.
For example, Ava regaled our group of friends with tales of how she traveled around Laos alone. Yes, she was in Laos, but she certainly wasn’t alone. Her parents were with her. How do I know? Because they told me so. Guess she didn’t realize I knew that little fact when she decided to exaggerate her travel stories.
# Never follow through on promisesMean people are renowned for never following through on their promises. For example, Ava told me, “There’s a position at my company that you would be perfect for. Send me your resume and I’ll personally speak to the director tomorrow.” Of course, I sent her my resume and followed up every chance I got. She either brushed me off or promised to get back in touch.
I finally contacted the HR department to apply for the job myself and found out that there was never an opening to begin with. Perhaps she simply wanted to show off. After all, being chummy with the director is no joke. Perhaps, she was simply trying to make conversation. In any case, that was when I realized Ava couldn’t be trusted.
# Hurtful wordsMean people have a gift for churning out what can only be described as complimentary insults. For example, instead of complimenting, “This quiche is amazing. I would love the recipe!” a mean person would say, “This quiche is amazing. Who made it? I know it wasn’t you!” They somehow know how to string words together so that they can inflict the maximum amount of hurt and pain, even if they’re saying something “nice.”
# Spiteful gossip mongers
Meanies take delight in pulling people down. All they want to do is talk about other people and nothing out of their mouths is good. Instead of focusing on Priscilla’s promotion, the mean person will probably hint that she got it because she slept with her boss.
# Play the blame gameWhen it comes to mean people, the blame always falls on everyone but themselves. They could be speeding through a red light in a school zone, run over an old lady in a wheelchair, and still place the blame on granny.
# Taint happy momentsMeanies always find a way to ruin happy events. Just a while ago, the internet was on fire because a Singaporean blogger brutally live blogged and tweeted her friend’s wedding. The blow-by-blow account scathingly insulted everything from the bride’s dress, to the decorations. Talk about having the worst wedding guest in the history of humankind.
# Manipulative mind gamesSomehow, mean people are masters at mind games. They know just what to say and do to have you questioning yourself. Whether it’s tearing down your belief system or indirectly mocking your weight, there’s always something for them to attack.