For one reason or another, the one you love so much has decided that you’re not a great match and there you are, covered in blankets and clutching a tub of ice cream, wondering how to stop caring about someone you love.
When you’re going through a breakup or any kind of heartbreak, it can feel like your world is over. They were once the person you ran to for everything, and now, they behave like you don’t exist!
This kind of heartbreak can hurt like a bitch, and as unbearable as it is now, here’s something you must remember -it is only temporary pain.
Even if it feels practically impossible to move on from them, you’re eventually going to stop missing them one day. It’ll take time, constant effort, and a lot of support, but it’s definitely possible.
# Vent to your friendsAs normal as it is to seek isolation after a breakup, let yourself be around your friends. They’ll not only make you feel better about the breakup, but they can offer helpful pieces of advice. Don’t just shut yourself off from the world. Talk to your friends and discuss how you’re feeling.
It’s also not very helpful to shut off your feelings entirely and numb yourself. It can work temporarily, but eventually, all your bottled emotions will burst.
# Think about their flawsIt’s really funny how a breakup can blind our perspective entirely and force us to only remember the good things about them. Just as it takes two for a breakup to occur, there are two sides to every story. So if you focus on the good traits, remember they also have significant bad characteristics.
Remembering the worst about someone can help you realize that maybe they weren’t so great after all. Perhaps it’s how they never had time for you, or they never hung out with your friends. Look back on your relationship and allow yourself to see their flaws.
# Think realistically about how you were togetherYou were happy. And you liked them a ton. But does that mean you were genuinely great together? Did you have the same morals and values? Were they someone you could build a future with? These are all valid thoughts and questions to have in learning how to stop caring about them.
If the answer to these was no, then maybe you weren’t so compatible after all. Remember, love is a powerful emotion, but sometimes it just isn’t enough.
# Get your friends’ opinionsYour friends can look at your situation without bias. You can’t. Therefore, you should always ask them what they think and how they can help.
Listen to them, and accept their views with an open heart. It’s not about justifying your relationship, or standing up for your ex. Your friends can give you the proper perspective that you’re too blind to see.
# Delete everything of theirs on social media
Get rid of any pictures with them and unfriend them if you can’t deal with it anymore. You can’t possibly learn how to stop caring about someone you once loved when their face keeps popping up everywhere.
This means absolutely no stalking them, their friends, or anything related to them online. It might sound harsh, but if muting or unfollowing them will do you some good, then do it!
# Get rid of their number if you want to stop caring about someoneYes, you also have to delete their number. Having access to contacting them is a huge no-no. Otherwise, you’re prone to drunk-calling them when you miss them or just texting them whenever you feel lonely or bored.
Things are over between you two, and this means deleting any contact you have left of them. You won’t be needing it any longer, so why hold on to it in the first place?
# Redirect your thoughts about themThis won’t be easy, but if you can do it, you’ll be able to stop caring about them with more ease. Whenever your thoughts are consumed with missing them and reminiscing the relationship you once had, shift your thoughts to another direction.
It takes a lot of self-awareness and discipline to master this, but you cannot ever dwell on your thoughts. That is if you really want to know how to stop caring about someone. Start thinking about something random or even sing a song in your head. This will, after a while, train your mind to bypass thoughts of them.