When a person realizes that he or she is no longer happy in a relationship, they will start to think of ways in order to fix the problem. When they can’t do it on their own, they will turn to their partner and voice their concerns. As easy as that sounds, not many people use that option – even though they should. So, here’s how to tell your partner you’re unhappy without hurting them or making them feel guilty in the process.
A lot of times, people allow the relationship to deteriorate to the point of no return, just because they were too afraid to tell their partner that they were unhappy in the first place.
If your relationship is making you unhappy, then there is definitely something wrong with your connection to your partner.
The only way you can fix it is by telling your partner how you feel and what you want to do about it. This will give them the chance to think about what they want as well and whether they feel the same way you do.
# Think about why you’re unhappyBefore telling your partner that you are having some doubts about the state of your relationship, consider first why you feel this way. Spend a day or more really giving this a deep thought.
You can’t just tell them that you suddenly started feeling disconnected from them. You have to assess your own feelings so that you can process them together.
# Think of what you’re going to sayDon’t just present the problem to your partner and wing it. If you want to know how to tell your partner you’re unhappy in the relationship, make sure you take the time and use the right words.
When you just blurt it out, your partner may not completely understand what you want to accomplish. If there’s any misunderstanding, the situation will be that much harder to fix.
# Prepare yourself for anything that can happen
Your partner may cry, get angry or even hurt you with their words. Finding out that the person you love is no longer happy *because of you* can be very painful to anyone.
Rational thinking might get thrown out the window because both your emotions are on overdrive.
# Be the bigger personNo matter what happens, don’t get baited into a fight. This conversation needs to happen and its purpose is, to be honest with your partner. It is not meant to put the blame on anyone because you are both responsible for the relationship’s success.
Be calm and explain yourself clearly. Don’t use harsh words and always be mindful of your partner’s feelings.
# Don’t leave anything out
Once your partner starts to get emotional, you might find yourself reluctant to say anything else. That’s a bad idea because not discussing the problem would mean that you caused your partner unnecessary pain.
You started the conversation about being unhappy with your partner, so you better finish it.
# Ask your partner what they want to doAlthough you have your own views on how things should progress, you need to ask your partner what they want. Respect whatever it is they need.
They may choose to end the relationship, or work harder at it. Either way, you need to discuss it thoroughly before taking matters into your own hands.
# Tell them what you wantIt’s a two-way street. The reason that you’re unhappy is that you want something that isn’t there. It could be affection, sex, more time together, more time apart, or just about anything.
If you don’t want to break up and they do, make them see that it’s not the solution you’re hoping for. If you want to break up and they don’t, make them understand why it’s better that way.
# Get closureOnce you tell your partner you’re unhappy in the relationship, don’t let the fight drag on for days or months. Make sure that you said everything that you needed to say. Allow them to tell you how they feel as well.
If they need more time, give it to them. Just don’t let the issue die down without being resolved. Sweeping the problem under the rug gives it the potential to haunt you again in the future.