Relationship arguments are inevitable for most couples. While some fortunate pairs rarely argue and have a complete understanding of each other, the majority of us experience occasional disagreements due to confusion or misunderstandings.
Arguing with your partner doesn’t make you a bad partner, nor does it signify an imperfect relationship. What truly matters is how you resolve the argument. The way you handle conflicts can define you as either a good or bad partner and can significantly impact the overall health of your relationship.
Though you might not be able to prevent arguments, you can control how you respond to them.
For those who feel that a first fight signals the end of the world, here are five things to keep in mind during an argument.
# Arguing Doesn’t Mean a BreakupDisagreements with your partner don’t necessarily indicate an impending breakup. In fact, arguing can be a healthy aspect of a relationship. Both parties in a mature relationship should understand that conflicts are temporary.
You care about each other enough to work through your issues, and that’s reassuring. Avoid using threats of breaking up during arguments unless you truly mean it.
# Watch Your Words – They Can Leave Lasting ScarsArguments can make tempers flare, but the words you use can leave lasting impacts. Even if you apologize or assure your partner that you didn't mean what you said, they may never forget it.
While it’s easier said than done in the heat of the moment, try to remember the feelings of the person you're arguing with. This is someone you love—do you really want to hurt them with harsh words?
# Occasional Arguments Are NormalIt can be hard to believe during a fight, especially if it’s one of your first, but arguing is a normal part of relationships. All couples have disagreements.
Healthy arguments can lead to better communication and may even signify a stronger commitment compared to couples who never argue. Those who argue care enough to resolve conflicts, whereas couples who never argue might lack the same level of connection or commitment.
# You've Overcome WorseNo matter how intense this argument seems, you've likely had more significant conflicts in the past. This too shall pass.
View the current disagreement as an opportunity to strengthen your relationship and improve your communication skills.
# Taking a Break Can Make a DifferenceWhether through silence, yelling, or sarcasm, arguments can be draining. The good news is that taking just five minutes away from the situation can help.
Research shows that a short break in a quiet, relaxing place, like a guest room or your car, can shift your mood and reduce the urge to argue.
Next time you’re in a heated argument, take a five-minute break. Sometimes, a change of scenery is all you need.