Lying during a first date may be perceived as unconventional. After all, shouldn't you present your true self and let the other person decide whether they're interested? Well, that's the ideal scenario. However, if revealing certain aspects about yourself prematurely causes the other person to lose interest before they've even had a chance to truly know you, then perhaps sticking strictly to that principle isn't always feasible.
First dates carry immense significance. They serve as a pivotal moment where you gauge compatibility and potential for further connection. Will there be enough mutual interest for a second encounter, or will you find yourself contemplating drastic measures like sneaking out of the bathroom window, changing your phone number, and fleeing town to avoid any future encounters?
While authenticity is paramount, there are certain boundaries regarding what you divulge to someone you've just met. I'll admit, I've been guilty of stretching the truth on a first date to avoid seeming too eccentric; I saved the full disclosure for a potential future disagreement.
# Your past relationships Bringing up exes on a first date isn't typically advisable, but if the topic arises, it's best to be discreet. Avoid mentioning extreme scenarios, like your ex attempting to run you over with a car or having a psychiatric breakdown. Instead, opt for a more neutral explanation, such as growing apart or differing life paths. Revealing tumultuous past relationships early on may raise concerns about your stability and could deter potential interest.
# Your sexual history While discussing one's sexual history on a first date might seem unlikely, it can happen. In such cases, it's prudent to exercise caution. Whether your number is high or low, it's often wise to provide a simplified, modest estimate. Revealing too high a number might intimidate or deter, while disclosing a very low count could create undue pressure. Aim for a rounded, moderately conservative figure, and consider revealing the accurate number later in the relationship if necessary.
# Unconventional desires Introducing your unconventional fetishes too early can be off-putting and may alter your date's perception of you. It's advisable to reserve such discussions for later stages of a relationship, when both parties are more comfortable and invested. In the initial stages, it's perfectly acceptable to assert that you don't have any known fetishes, allowing the relationship to develop before broaching such topics.
# Family dynamics Describing your family as loud and eccentric might scare off your date. When asked about your family, it's often prudent to provide a more generic response, such as portraying them as typical or normal. This can prevent further probing and alleviate any concerns about familial compatibility.
# Unusual collections Some collectibles, like porcelain dolls or hair snippets, may come across as unsettling if revealed too soon. It's best to keep such details to yourself initially to avoid creating a negative impression. While certain collections may be harmless, it's essential to gauge your date's comfort level before divulging potentially eccentric hobbies.
# Initial attraction While it's natural to feel an immediate attraction, declaring love at first sight can be overwhelming for your date. Excessive flattery can backfire, making them feel uncomfortable or pressured. Instead, convey genuine interest without overwhelming them with declarations of intense attraction.
# Future plans Discussing long-term aspirations, such as marriage and children, can be premature and overwhelming on a first date. Opt for more manageable goals, like career aspirations and personal growth, to convey your ambitions without overwhelming your date with expectations.
# Relationship with parents Whether you're close to your parents or not, it's often best to maintain a neutral stance on the matter. Claiming to keep in touch with your parents without delving into specifics can help avoid conveying neediness or a lack of family orientation, both of which can hinder the prospect of a second date.