9 Ways To Focus on Yourself in a Relationship

We don’t want to jinx your new relationship before it even takes off, but the reality is that relationships can come and go. It's essential to focus on yourself while in a relationship to safeguard against the possibility that it might not last.

This isn’t about being negative, but making time for yourself is always a good idea.

Not only does it allow you to continue growing and learning, but if things don’t work out, you won’t feel like you invested all of your time into something that didn’t pan out.

When you first connect with someone, it’s easy to get swept up in the excitement and devote all of your time to the new relationship.

Naturally, you want to get to know them better, share experiences, and spend as much time together as possible. When you're apart, you might feel anxious, which isn’t necessarily healthy.

While it’s tempting to pour everything into the new relationship, try not to give more than half of your time. We genuinely hope your relationship lasts, but we believe no relationship can thrive unless you both focus on yourselves as individuals.

Being happy and secure in who you are makes you a better, more attentive partner. The only way to achieve this is by maintaining a balance and nurturing your personal growth alongside your relationship. Trust us—it will make the time you spend together even better.

# Maintain your friendships

One of the biggest mistakes in a relationship is neglecting your friends to focus solely on your partner. Your friends were there before, and they'll be there if things go south. However, if you don’t make time for them, they might question the importance of the friendship.

Prioritize your friends and spend time with them regularly. Don’t cancel plans just to be with your partner—they’ll still be there when you get home. When you are with friends, avoid constantly texting or talking about your partner. Stay true to who you were before the relationship because that’s still you deep down. Friends are important, so don’t push them aside just because you're in a relationship.

# Continue doing what you love

It's easy to lose sight of yourself when you start a new relationship. The hobbies and passions you had before might fall by the wayside, but that’s a big mistake. Your interests are part of who you are. Letting go of them means you’re missing out on your own enjoyment.

Whether it’s reading, drawing, or baking at odd hours, keep doing what you love. Abandoning your passions will only leave you feeling unfulfilled later. It's also one of the key ways to stay focused on yourself within a relationship.

# Make time for yourself

Before your relationship, you probably spent some time alone. That alone time was important for relaxing and doing things you enjoy. Don’t give it up just because you're now with someone.

Alone time doesn’t mean loneliness—it shows that you value your own company, making you a stronger, more balanced person.

# Keep exploring and learning

Just because you’re in a relationship doesn’t mean you should stop trying new things. Continue exploring new hobbies, learning new skills, or even trying out different styles. Stopping your personal growth means losing a part of yourself.

If your partner is supportive, they’ll encourage you to pursue new interests. If they discourage your growth, it’s a red flag. Keep expanding your horizons—it’s essential for maintaining your individuality in a relationship.

# Prioritize your health

Lounging around with your partner and binge-watching Netflix might be tempting, but it’s not the healthiest way to live. Maintain a healthy lifestyle by eating well and staying active. Cooking together can be a fun way to ensure you're both taking care of yourselves. If you didn’t have a fitness routine before, now’s the perfect time to start!

In the early stages of a relationship, it’s easy to indulge in comfort food and late-night outings. While it's fun, don’t let your health slip in the process.

# Do things just for yourself

Make time to do things purely for your own enjoyment. Of course, balance it with quality time with your partner, friends, and family, but don’t hesitate to take a day for yourself. Whether it's reading in bed, soaking in a long bath, or watching your favorite TV show, it's important to prioritize your own happiness.

Focusing on yourself from time to time is key to a healthy, balanced relationship.

# Stay focused on your goals

When you meet someone new, it's easy to get swept up in the excitement and forget about your personal goals. Don’t let that happen. Whatever you were working towards before your relationship, keep pushing forward. Whether or not the relationship lasts, you'll regret not pursuing your goals.

# Stick to your boundaries

Boundaries are crucial in any relationship. Know what you're comfortable with and what you’re not. Setting and maintaining these boundaries protects you from losing yourself and being taken advantage of.

Focusing on yourself in a relationship means only doing things that align with your values and ensuring no one crosses your red lines.

# Create a me-only bucket list

Everyone's familiar with bucket lists, but have you ever made one just for yourself? While it’s common to make joint bucket lists with a partner, there’s no reason not to create a personal one too.

Think about the things you’ve always wanted to do—whether it’s skydiving or learning salsa. Whatever it is, make sure it’s something you truly want to do for yourself.