From quirky insights to time-worn advice, there are some essential tips you should know to help your marriage thrive. From heated arguments to passionate reconciliation, marriage encompasses all of that and much more in between.
Don't be deceived into thinking that lifelong matrimonial bonds are smooth and effortless. In fact, you might be surprised by the vast array of experiences you'll encounter over the years. However, with sound advice and helpful tips, you can navigate through them and emerge stronger as time goes on.
So, what happens when the honeymoon phase fades and real life kicks in? Do you walk away, or do you fight to keep the spark alive?
Some of this advice may sound familiar, but there's no denying the truth they hold. Here are the most valuable pieces of wisdom from those who have been there and know exactly what they're talking about.
# Don’t let your moods influence your wordsJust because you're feeling a certain way doesn't mean your partner has to feel the same. After a tough day at work, it's easy to vent your frustrations at home. Whether you're angry at a colleague, your boss, or yourself, remember not to project that onto your spouse, who had no part in it.
Your wife isn't to blame for your boss's criticism, and your husband didn’t cause your flight cancellation. Leave your negative feelings outside and don't bring them home.
It takes practice, but mastering this is key to maintaining a healthy relationship.
# Embrace sillinessDon’t shy away from being silly. Whether it’s starting a tickle fight, making goofy jokes, or dancing in your underwear, humor can lighten the mood and strengthen your bond.
Laughter really is the best medicine, and if you can’t have fun with your partner, what's the point of being together?
# Avoid the blame gameIt’s crucial to resist playing the blame game. Even when it’s easy to point fingers, small disputes like forgetting to close the garage door aren't worth arguing over.
When it comes to bigger issues, like feeling lonely after moving for your spouse’s career, or blaming each other for your child’s struggles, remember that you are a team. Take responsibility together and address resentment before it undermines your relationship.
# Focus on your partner’s best qualitiesAlways concentrate on the positives in your partner. When you start focusing only on their flaws, it signals a problem that needs immediate attention.
Instead of thinking, “He’s so irresponsible,” shift your perspective to, “I appreciate how he helps me relax by not sweating the small stuff.”
By seeing the best in each other, you’ll remember why you got married in the first place.
# Prioritize date nightsLife can get hectic, but don’t let it extinguish the spark that brought you together. If you can keep appointments with others, you can surely make time for your spouse.
Plan regular date nights, even if it’s just grabbing tacos from a food truck or watching a movie. Spend quality time together and nurture your connection. Children aren’t an excuse; find a sitter or relax with a glass of wine once they’re asleep.
This is an important way to keep your relationship strong.
# Keep a special place in your heart for your spouse
Infidelity is a major reason relationships fall apart. No matter how tempted you may feel, don’t jeopardize the trust you've built with your partner.
Keep a sacred space in your heart for them and don’t let anyone else in. Once that boundary is crossed, guilt and anger will replace trust and love. Why hurt the person you promised to cherish?
Resist temptation, both physically and emotionally, and protect your relationship.
# Understand your partner’s love languageMake an effort to cater to your spouse’s happiness, even if it’s not your favorite activity. If your husband loves surfing but you prefer the mountains, consider planning beach holidays for his enjoyment.
Understanding each other's love language shows care, even if you don't fully embrace their interests. What matters is that you tried, and that effort will be appreciated.
# Resolve arguments thoughtfullyYou'll hear different advice on handling arguments—some say never go to bed angry, while others recommend sleeping on it. It depends on your personalities.
If one of you needs space, give it. If you prefer to talk it out, do so. The key is compromising when resolving conflicts. If your wife wants to sleep on it while you prefer to talk, let her have her way and revisit the issue calmly the next day.
Compromise and sacrifice are essential in marriage. Establish a system you both agree on to handle disagreements effectively.
# Don’t let money issues divide youMoney is often a source of conflict in relationships. If you're facing financial challenges and your spouse isn’t willing to cut back, it’s a concern. However, minor disputes over expenses like organic milk aren’t worth the trouble.
Address financial difficulties as a team and seek professional advice if necessary. Develop a budget you can both stick to and remember that there’s rarely enough money to go around.
Avoid letting money drive a wedge between you.
# Work toward shared goalsTo make your marriage work, you both need to have aligned long-term goals. While you may be on different career paths, it’s important to share common objectives like saving for a house, funding your kids’ education, or planning for future milestones.
Support each other’s individual ambitions, but always make sure you’re heading in the same direction when it comes to the big picture.