20 Subtle Signs a Friend is Using You

Friendships are precious. The truly meaningful ones are cherished throughout our lives, supporting us through thick and thin. However, not all friendships are beneficial. Sometimes, individuals we believe to be friends may turn out to be deceitful, revealing themselves as harmful rather than supportive. Recognizing the signs of a friend who might be using you can help you avoid unnecessary distress.

Unfortunately, not everyone has your best interests at heart. A person who initially seems like a great friend might start displaying behaviors that contradict what you expect from a true friend.

When this happens, it's important to take action. Knowing that someone may be pretending to be your friend can be disheartening, but it allows you to scrutinize your relationships more closely. If you suspect that one or more individuals in your circle might be using you, it's time to address the issue.

Ultimately, it may be necessary to distance yourself from these individuals and seek out new, genuine friendships. Start by identifying the signs that a friend may be using you and take the necessary steps to surround yourself with people who truly value and support you.

# Your Friendship Feels Transactional

Some friends only stick around when they can benefit from you. If your friend frequently asks for money or makes you feel like a personal ATM, it’s a sign that the friendship may be more about what you can provide than genuine connection.

# They’re Holding You Back

If you’re trying to make positive changes in your life, like losing weight or quitting a bad habit, and your friend is unsupportive or discouraging, they may be acting out of self-interest rather than caring for your well-being.

# You Can’t Be Yourself

Ideally, friends should allow you to be your true self. If you feel like you can’t fully express who you are around your friend, it’s a red flag that the friendship might not be as genuine as it should be.

# You Do All the Work

A clear sign that your friend might be using you is if you’re the one always making the effort—whether it’s initiating contact, making plans, or providing support. If they only reach out when they need something, it’s a sign the friendship may be one-sided.