10 Subtle Signs You are an Overager People Pleaser

A people pleaser is an individual who places significant importance on satisfying the desires of others. Their primary aim in doing so is to gain approval and recognition from the individuals they are attempting to appease.

Being a people pleaser doesn't inherently imply being a negative person. They aren't necessarily manipulative or deceitful. However, due to their strong inclination to satisfy those around them, they might be willing to employ various tactics to earn someone's affection, even if it involves pressuring others or subtly influencing them.

In reality, most individuals have a touch of people-pleasing behavior within them. Nearly everyone makes efforts to accommodate others, with the expectation of being seen as agreeable or possibly receiving a favor in return at some point.

Nonetheless, the majority of us are aware of the limits to which we can extend this behavior.

Conversely, an excessively eager people pleaser lacks clear principles to define where the boundaries of pleasing others should be set.

# You crave for compliments

You freely offer compliments to your friends or colleagues, hoping to receive similar praise in return. While everyone appreciates compliments, individuals who seek to please others desire them even more, as they struggle to acknowledge their own positive qualities.

# You want to be noticed

It bothers you when your new haircut or the fresh shirt you put on for work goes unnoticed. If no one offers a compliment on an outfit you're wearing, you tend to assume that it doesn't suit you well, even if you initially liked it when you purchased it.

# You lie about your opinions

You lack a distinct identity and consistently claim to enjoy things, even if they don't genuinely interest you, solely to conform to your circle of friends.

Your preferences and aversions frequently shift based on the individuals in your vicinity.

# You can never say no

You avoid causing offense to anyone out of the fear that declining assistance might lead to negative opinions about you. Consequently, you find yourself consistently over committing by agreeing to help others.

For instance, a friend might ask you to assist with moving, despite your conflicting family gathering plans. You agree to help simply because you struggle with declining such requests.

# You don’t care about your loved ones

You invest considerable effort in catering to the opinions of your new friends or colleagues, aiming to create a positive impression in their eyes.

Simultaneously, you tend to undervalue the people who genuinely care for you, assuming their love is unwavering and taking their presence for granted. This is because you're aware they'll stand by you regardless of your actions or treatment towards them.

# You’re active around new friends

You consistently evade taking on responsibilities or contributing your opinions when you're around individuals who are familiar with you. On the contrary, you put in more effort when interacting with new friends you're attempting to impress. However, you become lax when the situation involves only you or someone who already holds a positive opinion of you.

While you might believe you're displaying your authentic self among those who know you well and assume there's no need to make an impression, it's essential to recognize that your loved ones might perceive your behavior as a lack of appreciation for their affection. This is due to the fact that you invest more kindness in individuals who are less invested in you.

# You always have a smile

Being a people pleaser, you refrain from displaying anger towards your friends or colleagues, even in situations where their actions are deeply distressing.

Instead, you internalize all that frustration, giving rise to a form of concealed or implosive anger within yourself.

# Being loved is top priority

You possess a desire for people to hold a favorable opinion of you wherever you find yourself, and you aim for every individual you encounter to regard you with genuine fondness.

In fact, you consistently make an effort to present your most positive attributes to anyone you cross paths with, nurturing the persistent aspiration that every person you meet will carry forward pleasant memories of your interactions.

# The opinion of others mater too much

The viewpoints of others hold significant weight in your considerations and impact your personal decision-making. Your choices are influenced by the preferences of those around you.

You actively seek input from all your friends, prioritizing their opinions over your own convictions. Their perspectives hold more sway in your decision-making process than your own sense of what is right.

# You like attention all the time

You experience apprehension about losing friendships and place a substantial emphasis on garnering widespread approval. The idea of being disliked by anyone or facing solitude is something you cannot even contemplate.