10 Tips to Have a Difficult Conversation and Follow Through Without Faltering

Reflect on the last time you faced a conversation you dreaded. You likely magnified it in your mind, turning it into something daunting. At the last moment, you lost your nerve and didn't go through with it. If this scenario sounds familiar, it’s time to learn how to tackle difficult conversations and see them through.

Navigating tough conversations isn't an innate skill; it requires time, patience, and understanding to handle them effectively and achieve positive outcomes.

Naturally, there's a risk of conflict. People often don't enjoy being on the receiving end of such discussions.

To overcome these challenges, you should familiarize yourself with the eleven key steps that will help you have a difficult conversation without backing out at the last minute.

# Choose the Right Moment

Timing is crucial for a difficult conversation. Avoid initiating it if the person seems stressed, tired, angry, unwell, or having a bad day. This will likely lead to a poor outcome. If these conditions exist, wait for a better day. You'll find the conversation goes more smoothly.

# Ensure Privacy

Difficult conversations should be conducted in private. Don’t start the conversation if others are around or if there’s a chance of being interrupted. As with timing, ensure privacy to facilitate a better dialogue.

# Avoid Saying “We Need to Talk”

This phrase puts the other person on the defensive. Instead, approach the conversation naturally and casually. Reflect on the last time you heard “we need to talk” – it probably caused you to panic.

# Plan What You Want to Say

Think about your main points beforehand without scripting the conversation. This helps ensure you don't forget important points and avoids the need for a follow-up on a difficult discussion. Know how you'll start and what you want to convey.

# Keep an Open Mind

Don’t expect the conversation to follow a specific path. Have your main points ready, but be flexible and allow the conversation to flow naturally.

# Mind Your Body Language

Your body language should align with your words. Avoid defensive postures like crossing your arms or legs, fidgeting, or avoiding eye contact. Be relaxed, mirror their position, and maintain eye contact to avoid appearing confrontational.

# Be Direct

Clearly and concisely state your points without unnecessary elaboration. Prolonged explanations can lead to confusion and frustration. Make your main point clear from the start and then elaborate.

# Choose Words and Tone Carefully

Words can change meaning with different tones, such as sarcasm. Avoid overly complex words that may confuse or intimidate the other person. Keep your language simple and clear, without being condescending.

# Consider Their Perspective

This is a conversation, not a lecture. Be open to the other person’s input and try to understand their point of view. Recognize that your perspective might not be entirely correct, and be willing to see their side.

# Listen Actively

Truly listen to what the other person is saying, including non-verbal cues like tone and body language. Active listening is crucial for understanding and effectively navigating difficult conversations.