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15 Questions For A New Relationship To Gain Clarity
By: Kratika Wed, 11 May 2022 1:39:17
If you just started dating someone, you’re still in the early stages of getting to know who they are. Everything seems amazing. You have butterflies when you’re around them. But you still have a lot to learn about them. The best way to get to know someone is by asking the right questions for a new relationship.
Without asking questions, you will sit in a fun and flirty zone without ever learning anything. Then when something important arises, you won’t know how to handle it or if your beliefs align.
It is so important to ask questions for a new relationship to find out if you have a future or not. The last thing you want is to find out years down the road that they don’t share any of the same core beliefs as you.
But of course, that doesn’t mean sitting them down, shining a light in their eyes, and demanding answers.
# How do you define intimacy?
Is intimacy purely sex? Or is intimacy a variety of things like hugging, cuddling, and kissing? This is a great question for a new relationship, whether you’ve already had relations or not.
# When are you the most “you”?
Is there a person, place, or activity that makes you feel like yourself?
# If money wasn’t an issue, what would you do with your time?
This is a great question for a new relationship even though it is undeniable that money is involved in so much of our lives. Asking this lets you know what is truly important to them and if they love their job or just work to pay the bills?
# What kind of parent do you think you’d be?
Do you even want kids in the future? If so, how do they see themselves parenting their children? Will that raise their potential kids as their parents did? Will they guide them through a religion? Do you agree with their answers?
# Are you a spender or a saver?
This is one of those important questions for a new relationship people just don’t discuss! Sure, it can be a little personal to ask this question for a new relationship, but money issues lead to more breakups than you realize.
Can they save money, or are they someone who loves to spend every dollar they have? Figuring this out now and discussing how you might handle joint finances before it becomes a problem can help.
# What have you learned from your past relationships?
If they’ve dated people in the past, they probably have some lessons they learned. What are they? If they didn’t learn anything, that’s not a good sign.
# What about yourself are you most proud of?
Let them show off and tell you how wonderful they think they are!
# How would you feel if I made more money than you?
Are they okay with their partner making more money than them? Or is this something that bothers them? Discuss why if they do struggle with this. Is it something you can sort out?
# Do you believe in monogamy?
You don’t want to find out five years down the road they believe in polyamorous relationships when you don’t. This is one of those questions for a new relationship you need to get out of the way in the beginning. And talk about what monogamy means to you.
# What are your relationship dealbreakers?
What are the things in a relationship they cannot tolerate? Maybe they can’t get on board with a partner who smokes or travels too much. Perhaps you need to have the same beliefs or stances.
# How do you express your love?
We all have different ways to express our love to the people around us. Maybe they enjoy giving gifts or being affectionate. Find out their love language so you can both meet each other in the middle.
# What are your biggest fears about relationships?
Is it cheating? Or being lied to? These may have something to do with their past, but they are almost always carried into the future.
Find out what their fears are, and be prepared to share your own. Discussing this early on can help you get it out in the open to be more patient with each other.
# What do you do in your alone time?
Do they read? Fish? Paint? What are their hobbies? Everyone should have something they enjoy doing in their spare time. Do you both enjoy the same things?
# Are you friends with any of your exes?
How do they feel about their exes? Were they all “crazy”? If so, that is a major red flag.
Are they good friends with their exes or at least cordial? You may think talking about exes is a bad idea, but it can help you understand their headspace regarding past relationships. t couples totally ignore early in the relationship]
# What have you struggled with your entire life?
Everyone has something they’re trying to overcome in their lives. What is their struggle? Did they come from poverty? Do they deal with mental health struggles?
This can be difficult to talk about, but this is one of the more important questions to ask for a new relationship so you can understand each other better.