10 Tips To Stop Obsessing Over Guy You Hardly Know

You may not admit this, but at some point in your life you have obsessed over a guy- it could be your friend’s ex-boyfriend, a married guy, a celebrity, or some silly guy you barely know. Whatever the case, the feeling is bad yet you can’t stop it. What are you supposed to do? The man is incredibly attractive, you barely know him, he is not your ex, but you don’t seem to stop thinking about him. Perhaps he is taken or you once slept with him on a one night stand. Know that you are not the first to be in this kind of a situation; it happens to most women- married, single, engaged, old, and young. Don’t fret because there are 10 tips that will help you ditch the unhealthy obsession.

# Find a distraction

Obsessing over a guy is time-consuming, so you should stop wasting your time. There are many ways you can distract yourself from this thing. Start a new hobby, start attending the gym, go on a vacation, or start gardening- do anything to keep you preoccupied. Incorporating healthy activities in your life will make you more productive by eliminating unhealthy thoughts. Eventually, you become a better person. Anytime you start obsessing, find a different line of thought or activity and transplant it into your schedule. For instance, remind yourself that you have some gardening work to do or two sets of exercises to complete. If you develop this habit, you will soon find ways to get him out of your mind.

# Look for flaws to stop obsessing over this guy

If you can see him for who he truly is, you will stop holding him high on a pedestal. In your mind, you probably see him as a super-hot deity and forget to see his human side. Try taking him from the pedestal and you will realize that he is an annoying person- you will start to see his flaws and he will be less fascinating. Nobody is perfect. Stop looking at your ex or crush through colored glasses and start finding his imperfections. If you only focus on his pros, you are not getting his full picture. Sit down and list the number of cons he hides under the rug and you will realize that he is not the great guy you think he is. This tactic might make you develop some hatred towards the guy but you shouldn’t worry.

# Seek good counsel on how to stop obsessing

When you are caught up in something, it becomes hard to see the entire picture. With a history with this guy and your feelings involved, it is incredibly hard to get yourself out. This is where you need counsel- from a close friend or a psychological therapist. Present your tribulations to another person and s/he will help you see the truth. Two heads are better than one and maybe your friend was once involved in a similar situation and they can tell you what they did to get over it.

# Face your fears

Sometimes, exploring your fears will help you get over some obsessive thought cycles. Perhaps you have not yet admitted to yourself that this man cannot be yours because you are simply not his type. Maybe you don’t like him that much, and all you need is to fill that emptiness in your heart. A part of you tells you that he is Casanova who likes messing with girls and you keep hoping that someday he will stop the behavior if he gives you a chance. No matter the reason, you need to sit down and face your fears.

# Stop making him feel important

The key here is to reduce his importance. Stop making your life revolve around him- no more trying to please him, don’t make plans for him, and stop chasing him if you’ve ever slept with him. Next is to make another person important in your life; this can be you or another guy. Look out of the window and see what else you love in this life besides this guy. You have a lot of energy and passion that can be directed to other things in life. Consider going to the beach, painting, helping the needy, or enrolling for a course you have always wanted to do. Think about how other things you love and how they enrich your life. Find purpose in those things and pursue them. You will soon notice that you have some much more to do instead of obsessing over a guy you barely know.

# Keep distance with the guy you are obsessing over

If you have ever given a friend some tips to stop obsessing over their boyfriend, why do you find it hard to face the situation courageously when you are the one living it? One of the best things you can do is to create a distance and stop seeing the guy frequently. You will be in a better position to evaluate the situation and find out why you are obsessing. Even though absence makes your heart grow fonder, it will enable you in this case to reveal the negative sides of obsessing so that you can fix it.

# Surround yourself with people who love you

This doesn’t mean you need to get a lover immediately; it could be your family or a close friend. These will make you feel loved and valued because they cherish your company. Do this more often and you will remind yourself that you deserve better treatment! If you feel good around other people, you won’t have to imagine being around a guy you barely know for compassion.

# Stop obsessing over his social media updates

If you have a secret affection for a particular man, your ex or someone you slept with a long time ago, you obviously have him in the list of your friends on Twitter, Instagram or Whatsapp. You keep lying to you that you only want to take a quick glance at his recent photos and status updates, only to spend a whole hour downloading his best pictures and checking other girls who like them. This will not help you stop the obsessive cycle but rather fuel it. Like the saying goes, if you keep him out of sight, he will be out of your mind in no time. So stop checking the social media pages of ex. Delete or block him if that will help.

# Look at the positive things about yourself

Do you know how amazing you are? It is important that you understand your self-worth so that you put yourself on a pedestal and not this guy you have been obsessing over. He is definitely not worth your attention if he is not actually in your life. It is not your fault that you can’t stop obsessing- you are just human. But remember that you are an intelligent, likable, and beautiful woman and nobody should take up the entirety of your thoughts if he doesn’t deserve you.

# Remember the past

If you are prone to this habit, it is difficult to find a perspective and realize how much you are being silly. Remember the last time you had an obsession for a guy you slept with? Was it worthy or pointless? It will dawn on you that obsessive thoughts do not change anything at all. You only feel more miserable and pathetic about yourself especially if you barely know the man. Try to analyze your past relationships and encounters with men and avoid the same mistakes.