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5 Questions To Help You Decide When Is The Right Time To Say I Love You
By: Kratika Fri, 22 Apr 2022 1:45:04
Falling in love is overwhelming. It is uncontrollable. And it is magical. But, is saying I love you the moment you feel it too soon? Really, how soon is too soon to say I love you? If you say it too soon, you might scare them away. But say it too long, you might make them impatient and think that you don’t love them.
So really, timing is the most crucial factor here. You’ll know it’s the right moment when you feel in your gut that it’s the only acceptable thing you should do at that moment.
Knowing the ideal time to profess your love in a relationship, especially a fairly new relationship, can be a huge source of stress. You don’t want to hold back your feelings, but you also don’t want to rush things or scare off your partner.
So, how do you know how soon is too soon to say I love you? Asking yourself these questions may help you decide when the right time for you is.
# Are you sure it is love?
Confusing love and infatuation is easy to do. We can get so wrapped up in the romance or passion of a new person that we think we’re in love when it’s really a fleeting feeling. When deciding how soon is too soon to say I love you, don’t just say the words for the sake of saying them or to get things all over with.
Rather, say it because you really do love them and can’t imagine feeling anything else for them. There’s no rational explanation why you love someone; you just do.
So before saying those three words, make sure that it’s really love and you’re not just mistaking it for attachment, infatuation, or lust.
# How much time have you really spent together?
It is possible to fall in love quickly, but it may be too soon to say ‘I love you’ if you haven’t really spent much time together. Intimacy happens the longer you spend time with someone, so how can you say you love them if you’ve been on less than five dates?
Consider how much time you’ve spent with this person. Do you know them well enough to gauge their reaction to those three words? Have you shared anything personal with one another? Don’t rush saying the words if you don’t want to scare them off for good.
# Are you on the same page?
It’s probably too soon to say I love you if you aren’t both looking for the same thing. If you want a committed relationship and they want something casual, it’s definitely too soon to share those three words.
It’s possible for them to change their minds but unless they state otherwise, then don’t say I love you when you can predict the exact response they’re going to provide you with. Also, why would you date someone with different intentions than you?
Stop falling for potential; it rarely works out the way you want it to.
# Are you ready to be vulnerable?
When deciding how soon is too soon to say I love you, make sure you’re ready to be vulnerable and naked with them *no, we don’t mean naked in a physical way.* Not to discredit the value of physical intimacy, but it’s much harder to be emotionally and mentally intimate with someone.
So before you say those three words, realize the implication and meaning behind those words. Can you bare your heart and soul to them? Are you okay with showing them your not-so-pretty sides? Can you tell them your deepest heart’s desires?
Sharing those words is a big step and it brings you a lot closer which can leave you open to more pain potentially. Make sure vulnerability is something you can provide before you end up saying it.
# Do you trust them?
Trust and love go hand in hand. You can’t claim to love someone if you don’t trust them to begin with, as that’s how the majority of relationships fall apart. When that happens, relationships can easily become toxic and dysfunctional because the feelings are there but communication and honesty aren’t.
You have to trust them wholeheartedly before telling them you love them. Otherwise, what’s the point of love without trust?