5 Things You Should Not Do When Trying To Let Someone Down

There are quite a few ways to let someone down easy, but what you may think is a good method could actually be a pretty common mistake.

When you are planning to let someone down easy, you aren’t just thinking about not wanting to hurt them but also your own discomfort. As much as you convince yourself it is all about protecting the other person’s feelings, it is also about you.

But, making yourself comfortable when letting someone down isn’t the priority. You will feel awkward. How could you not?

Turning someone down for any reason is weird. You don’t like being around someone who’s upset regularly, but knowing you caused those feelings sucks.

# Do not lie

I know it may seem like a good idea to come up with a lie so they don’t take your rejection personally. But it won’t help in the long run. You are trying to spare their feelings by claiming you still have feelings for your ex or are too busy with work, but would you buy that?

Lying is usually obvious when you are letting someone down, so don’t bother coming up with one. Telling the truth is always the best bet.

# Do not apologize

This is something so many people do, I’m guilty of it myself. We apologize when rejecting someone because we feel bad, but apologizing means you did something wrong. Telling someone how you feel is never wrong.

You’re doing what is right for you. Be firm and honest but you don’t have to apologize. Saying sorry is more about lessening your own guilt than helping their feelings.

# Don’t be subtle

You don’t need to give specific details about why you’re no interested in them. But don’t be too subtle either. Saying something like you’re busy or going out of town doesn’t actually say what you mean. And it leaves them thinking there is still a chance.

If you don’t want to spend more time with this person, be clear and concise about it. Beating around the bush might be more comfortable for you, but it only confuses the person you’re letting down even more.

# Don’t put it off

If you’re wondering how to let someone down easy, don’t stall. Don’t put off ending things because you can’t face their reaction. The longer you let things go on without saying anything, the worse it’ll be for you and them. You may think avoiding them would give a hint of what’s to come, but it doesn’t.

If you want to let someone down easy, you actually have to let them down, not put it off until you can’t take it anymore. When you know it won’t work out, they should too.

# Don’t be too specific

You can be honest and tell them you don’t see it working out because you want different things in your future or have different lifestyles. But you don’t have to go into details.

It is one thing to say you don’t click, or you see the world differently. It is entirely different to list the reasons you don’t like them. Don’t do that, especially if you want to let them down easy.