5 Ways To Rebuild Life After Divorce At 50

Once the storm of legal proceedings has passed, you may find surviving divorce after 50 a lot harder than you imagined. As long as you look at it as a chance for a do-over, you can reclaim your life and steer it in any direction possible. From embracing the liberating new-found independence from a long, stifling marriage to getting back on the dating scene again, the world is your oyster. Here is how you can pick up the pieces and rebuild your life brick by brick:

# Allow yourself to grieve

Leaving your husband in your 50s is not easy. Nor is leaving your wife in your 50s an everyday occurrence, no matter how commonplace divorce may have become. You have seen a lot and are a tough cookie, we get it! But you don’t need to be hard on yourself. No matter if you were the one who was caught by surprise in the divorce or the one to initiate it, you are allowed to feel everything that you are feeling.

The familiarity of a life as you know it, a life of 20 years, 30 years, or more, becomes too hard to snap out of. Recognize the emotions you are feeling. Fear, overwhelm, betrayal, anger, tiredness, or something else. Ask yourself, “I am divorced and alone at 50. It’s not easy. What am I feeling?” Denial is the biggest disservice you can do to yourself. Recognizing your emotions is the first step to taming them. It’s a battle half won!

# Let the bitterness dissolve

If you want to learn how to start over after divorce at 50 plus, you must begin by letting resentments and blame go. If you are consumed by bitterness, you might find it difficult to focus on rebuilding your life after divorce. You can try the following to manage negative thoughts:

- Practice journaling to jot down your thoughts
- Practice gratitude listing. Research has shown gratitude positively affects psychological well-being
- Practice daily affirmations. If you have faith in new-age spirituality, find solace in the practice of manifestations and Law of Attraction
- Approach trusted friends or family members and share your feelings with them
- Seek help from a mental health counselor or therapist for guided and supervised release of negative emotions.

# Review your definition of relationships

You must switch your viewing glasses if you are thinking of your past marriage as a failure. There is a tendency to see divorce, breakup, or separation as a failure. This mentality makes it more difficult to let go of the resistance and embrace the new phase that is awaiting you.

Nothing is eternal. You must remember, in one way or the other, everything comes to an end. That it ended doesn’t mean it was incomplete. See your divorce as nothing more than a milestone. A satisfactory end to an important phase in your life and the beginning of a new one.

# Rediscover yourself

Ending decades-long marriage can bring with it confusion and disorientation. The pace and tone of life, satisfying or not, do become familiar and comfortable. To tackle that disorientation, you will have to reacquaint yourself with “you”. You will not only need to depend on yourself from here on but you will also be spending a lot of time with yourself. Make sure to rebuild your relationship with yourself before worrying about how to rebuild life after divorce at 50. Try the following ways of self-love:

- Take a vacation
- Revisit an old hobby
- Reacquaint yourself with food that you liked. Individuals in-charge of cooking in the household tend to overlook their personal taste and choices in food
- Try mixing up your wardrobe, or repainting your home
- See if you would like to meet new people.

# Prepare yourself for dating in your 50s after divorce

Talking about meeting new people, you will eventually want to date other people later in life. It is possible that you are not at that stage right now, and think you never will. That is completely normal. It is completely understandable to not want to go through the same ordeal once again after spending a long time with a single person.

But even if you were not looking for romantic connections, you may eventually have the mental bandwidth to forge new friendships. Companionship may even be helpful later in life. Studies have shown that as people grow older, they begin to find more value in activities with friends as compared to family members.