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6 Ways To Deal With The People Who Put You Down
By: Kratika Sat, 24 July 2021 3:28:44
Whether your sister makes fun of you to no end or a coworker always gives you back-handed compliments, you do not deserve to be around people who put you down. Everyone deserves to be respected no matter their looks, position, race, religion, and everything else.
Dealing with people who put you down is something we all must learn eventually. Whether in the schoolyard, the conference room, or online, we all need to face our bullies and they need to face us.
# Block them
If someone is putting you down online, it is simple. Block them. It can seem harsh. You don’t need to put up with that. Sure, we know the internet is not always a safe space. You have the right to make what you see as positive as you can.
If the people who put you down are at work or school, avoid them. You don’t need to hide from them, but limit your interactions as much as possible. This is sort of like the advice about ignoring a bully and they’ll get bored and go away.
# Respond with a compliment
This can be one of the most difficult ways to deal with people who put you down. However, it is also the most effective. It will either shut them up or lead them to an apology.
Next time someone gives you a backhanded compliment like, “You’re so brave to wear a swimsuit in public.” Or “That came out well, for you,” give them a compliment about anything.
They will be so taken off guard, they won’t know what hit them.
# Ask follow-up questions
Most bullies will put you down in a way that embarrasses you in the moment and leaves you feeling defeated. It isn’t until hours later that you think of something clever you could have said.
When you can’t fight back in the moment, ask questions. If they insult your body, your style, or your work performance, ask them follow-up questions. They really should internalize the things they’re saying.
# Tell yourself the opposite
Whenever you hear someone put you down, tell yourself the opposite of what they said. Remind yourself that you know the truth. What this person is saying doesn’t carry any weight.
# Remember it is about them
When someone puts you down, it says a lot more about who they are than it does about you. If they body shame you, it is a reflection of their skewed way of looking at health and body positivity. It isn’t actually about how you look or who you are.
Most of what people say when putting others down is built out of their own insecurities. Then they force onto others to lift themselves up or ignore their own personal issues.
# Know their words do not reflect on you
Whether they put you down with words you know are untrue or with things you already feel insecure about, remind yourself that these are their words. This is coming from them. It has nothing to do with you.
You were there in a moment of weakness when this person felt the need to pick on you. They are jealous or have a false sense of superiority.