6 Ways To Get Over Being Cheated On

As someone who endured a relationship where I was cheated on repeatedly for about 4 years, I can tell you not to do what I did. Do not stay with a cheater. Do not blame yourself. When it comes to learning how to get over being cheated on, I hope you can learn from all of my mistakes.

Being cheated on is brutal. It makes you feel foolish, hurt, heartbroken, and angry. It lowers your self-esteem. It breaks your trust not just with the person who cheated but with yourself.

Once you come to terms with the fact that being cheated on was not about you, you can start to work on how that experience changed you and how to recover.

You can learn how to get over being cheated on. It isn’t easy. You need a lot of self-discovery and rationality which can feel a bit pointless at first.

# Mourn

You do not need to get over being cheated on right away. You have every right to mourn the loss of that relationship. You can be sad or angry or pissed. You can feel like crap.

Take that time. Grieving that relationship is healthy and helps you let go of it. You can look back on the good times while knowing it ended and you were betrayed. It is okay to miss the person that cheated on you even though they hurt you.

# Get closure

I don’t fully believe in closure. A lot of people feel the need to have one last conversation to end things once and for all. Once you’ve been ghosted and lied to enough times, you realize that no conversation, apology, or meetup is going to change what happened.

So, if your partner is begging to explain or to see you or if you feel you need that explanation, go ahead and get it. There is no guarantee it will help you. It probably won’t give you an epiphany or help you move on overnight. But, if you feel you need it and your ex is open to it, then go ahead. Just be prepared for a letdown.

# Take time

You do not need a rebound in order to learn how to get over being cheated on. You don’t need to start dating again or be able to trust someone new right away.

Take time to be single. Rebuilding your self-esteem after being cheated on is so important. Until I realized that I didn’t need someone’s assurance or undivided attention to feel secure, I wasn’t ready to trust anyone, let alone myself.

# Protect

I have heard a lot of people say that trying to protect your heart ruins a potential relationship or sets you up for failure. I’m sure you’ve heard that without putting yourself out there risking it, you won’t get what you really want. That is partially true, but you don’t need to rush it.

You can meet people and date without being fully open. You don’t need to trust people right off the bat. These experiences are what slowly pull you out of your comfort zone. And it is okay to take your time.

# Try

It can be daunting to start dating and trying to trust someone new. I’ve done it. Unfortunately, I had some bad luck and began to trust people that were liars. And that is always a possibility. But, what I learned from actually putting myself out there was that it isn’t my loss, it’s theirs.

When someone lies to me or leads me on, instead of dwelling on that and thinking I’m not good enough I think of it as a step towards moving on. I am proud of myself for trying and putting myself out there even though it was scary. Even if it doesn’t work out, it is a sign you are getting over being cheated on.

# Let it be

Some people need to go out and date a lot to be able to trust someone new. Some people need to be single and trust themselves. Some people need a bit of both. That was me.

For about six years, I dated on and off with a lot of bad luck after being cheated on. I was ghosted, lied to, and cheated on again. It sucked. But around year four, I was finally coming to terms with what I wanted.