7 Guidelines To Follow When Deciding How Long A First Date Should Last

First dates have the ability to make magic happen, but how long should a first date last?

You meet someone and they are exactly as they claimed to be when you heard about them. They are cute with perfect candor.

Or, sometimes a first date has the ability to bring hell on earth. You’re gritting your teeth and suffering through their awkward conversation, rude demeanor, or straight-up weird behavior. You’ve been counting down the seconds until it’s been an appropriate amount of time to politely bail.

All of this social anxiety begs the question: how long should a first date last?

Should a first date be confined to a 30-minute time limit or should you let it go as long as it’s fun? What constitutes ‘enough time’ to get to know one another? Is it okay if a first date lasts for 10 hours?

When it comes to how long a first date should last, the real answer is that it should last long enough for you to get to know your date. Whether your date lasts one hour or four hours, you should make sure you plan it accordingly.

# Long enough to get to know one another

The date should last as long as it takes to get a good idea of who you’re sitting across from. There’s a common understanding that people make snap judgment first impressions of others within the first 7 seconds of meeting!

That’s not a lot of time to impress your date. Therefore, you need to commit yourself to giving this person a fair chance to get to know them before cutting your date short.

# Short enough to bail if it sucks

You want to plan an evening that is both fun, active, and allows time for chit-chat. That being said, you also want a date that you can bail on if things aren’t going very well.

Planning a 4-hour lunch cruise around the harbor sounds romantic, but it isn’t exactly bail-worthy. *unless you brought a lifejacket!*

It’s always good to have a friend ready to be your scapegoat for a date-gone-wrong. Tell your BFF to call you 30 minutes into the date. Tell your friend that if you pick up the phone, that means the date’s going awry and you’re using them as an excuse to leave.

If you ignore their call, things are going well!

# Don’t overkill your time together

Dates can last anywhere from 30 minutes to 5 hours; the latter being a bit of an overkill if you’re just meeting for the first time. Unless you guys have really hit it off from the get-go, odds are you’re going to have an awkward silence or two during the course of your date.

Dragging a date on for hours on end may sound romantic, but it may end up ruining your date if you run out of things to talk about.

# Don’t play by someone else’s rules

Some singles prefer to meet up for coffee to get a real feel for one another. Coffee dates are great for either first dates or first meets. First of all, everybody loves coffee.

Second, if you aren’t feeling the spark, you can leave as soon as you’re done with your cup. But if the date picks up, you can always turn your coffee date into a meal or a walk to spend a little more time together.

# The longer the date, the more expensive it is

If you are the one paying for the first date, then you need to think about how much it will cost. If you don’t make a lot of money, then this is a very serious thing you need to keep in mind.

If your first date lasts over an hour, then you will most likely spend more than $10-15. Let’s say you are going out for drinks. Let’s face it – cocktails aren’t inexpensive. So, the longer you are there, the more you will drink, and the more you will spend. You might even get hungry and order food.

# The length of the date can shape your perception of the other person

Let’s say that you are a guy and you are paying for the date. If you are freely giving a woman your time and money – and a lot of it – she might perceive your value to be less than it really is.

In other words, in her mind, if you’re a “hot commodity” and have lots of dates lined up with other women, she might want you more.

# First dates that last over an hour can be uncomfortable

When you don’t know someone, there are a lot of ways a first date can go wrong. It’s more difficult to keep the conversation flowing naturally and keep having fun with each other.

After a while, the date could end up feeling like an interview. This happens quite a bit. For example, let’s say this person is just firing you question after question about yourself while saying very little about themselves. It can get exhausting if that’s how it’s going.