7 Most Telling Traits Of A Cold Person
By: Kratika Wed, 07 Apr 2021 3:38 PM
Whether it’s someone at work, an old friend, or even your romantic partner, a cold person is never easy to deal with.
Even the “best” cold-hearted person can be a major headache, and learning how to live with them is something you have to do if you don’t want to cut them out of your life.
But how can you be sure that a difficult person you’re dealing with is really “cold”?
In this article I’ll discuss the 19 most telling traits of a cold person, helping you understand life from their point of view, and what exactly makes them so cold.
# They Don’t Ask About You
One of the first things you’ll notice about a cold person is that they don’t really seem interested in you.
Everything they know about you is made up of stuff you told them willingly, without any of the usual social promptings.
When you stop talking about yourself, they stop knowing more about who you are.
It doesn’t matter if you’re just an acquaintance, a childhood friend, or their romantic partner — they won’t ask you about you.
They won’t ask about your day, your work, or even your sickly mother in the hospital.
# They Don’t Have Any Good Relationships
A good way to tell if a person is cold-hearted is to look at their past and see their track record when it comes to previous relationships, whether with friends, family, or ex-partners.
For many of us, relationships come naturally, but that doesn’t mean they’re always easy.
Relationships take work, and that’s often work that cold people don’t want to do.
We all understand the value and importance of having good relationships in our lives, and so we understand why we need to put effort into maintaining these relationships and keeping them alive.
# Sex Never Feels Like Anything More Than Sex
Being in a relationship with a cold person is never easy.
Even if they sincerely love you (and you know they do), they won’t show the usual cues that we associate with love, and one major cue is through sex.
When you sleep with someone you love and who loves you back, it’s more than just the physical act of sex.
It’s emotional and thoughtful at the deepest level of connection.
It’s the pure difference between having sex and making love, and it’s a kind of moment you can only feel with someone you really feel bonded with.
But sex with a cold person will very rarely ever feel more than physical activity, no matter how great or wild that sex may be.
# They Like To Be In Control
Interacting with people usually means keeping everyone happy; no one wakes up in the morning thinking to themselves, “I want to make everyone around me miserable!”
And when we find ourselves in situations where we have to be in charge of other people, that can be stressful or challenging, because we’re always asking ourselves things like, “Is everyone okay with what we’re doing?” or “Is everyone happy right now?”
But cold people don’t have that issue.
They thrive when they’re in total control of situations because they don’t think of the wants, needs, and emotions of those around them.
# They Don’t Know How To Empathize With Others
Think about the last time you cried during a movie. Or the last time a book or a song made you hold your breath, just because of how much it emotionally moved you.
We come with this innate ability to feel for those around us, even if it’s just a fictional story or a piece of music.
This is known as empathy, or the act of putting ourselves in the shoes of another person to feel their pain and understand them.
Cold people have varying levels when it comes to their lack of empathy, with some having slightly less empathy than everyone else, and others having absolutely no empathy at all.
# They Are Manipulative and Destructive
We all have impulses that we ignore because acting out on them would mean we have to face the consequences of what we’ve done.
Sometimes we just want to shout at a friend or family member who did something wrong to us; other times we wish we could just end a relationship right then and there without worrying about the social aftershocks.
For cold people, weighing the consequences of immoral actions isn’t so much of an issue.
As they don’t see the value in other people (and their relationships with other people), they don’t see the problem with hurting or manipulating those around them.
# They Are Independent
While there are several downsides to being a naturally cold-hearted person, it doesn’t always make a person bad.
One positive trait of being cold is natural independence that most other people may not have.
Whereas other children grow up relying on the friendships they build with those around them, cold people grow up learning how to keep themselves happy and satisfied.
They find an individual strength within them, because they spend their time learning how to navigate the world and all its challenges without asking others for help.