7 Tips On How To Be Careful Of Who You Trust

Trust is very fragile, and once broken, it's difficult to piece back together. To avoid the broken pieces, be careful who you trust in the first place.

Have you ever noticed that most kids will talk to just about anyone about anything. They'll give out personal details about their life and tell their most intimate secrets—there really isn't much that they hold back. Even if you tell them to be careful who they trust, it's something that just flies off the top of their head!

As we grow older, though, we learn from experience that there are some people whom we can trust, and many, many others whom we can't. Even in committed relationships like marriages, there are betrayals of trust that can throw you for a loop.

But the problem is that if we don't learn to rely on others and find it in our hearts to love, survival is extremely difficult. There is nothing worse, however, than thinking that we can trust someone only to find that they have not earned it. When you feel betrayed, it's nearly impossible to trust again. The key is not to make the same mistake twice.

# If they have done it in the past, they will do it again

If there is one thing that is true about human nature, and why you need to be careful who you trust, it’s because we are creatures of habit.

The saying, “Once a cheater, always a cheater” is normally very true. If someone has the propensity to betray your trust initially, there is really nothing stopping them from doing it again. Remember that not everyone deserves your trust.

# Just because you wouldn’t betray their trust doesn’t mean that they will honor the same code

We often assume that we are like everyone else and live by the same rules. The older I get, the more I realize that the assumption I have that everyone thinks and feels the same way as me is entirely false.

If you have a set of rules for yourself, don’t ever make the false assumption that everyone else shares those same ethics and values. We all live by our own rules and moral codes.

# Secrets, secrets are no fun

Even if you think you’re telling someone something in confidence, keep in mind that the more secretive the subject is, the more likely it is to be spread. Be careful who you trust with your secrets. Some people can be very good at hiding their sneaky, backstabbing ways.

# Don’t ever trust the drama queen

Be careful who you trust because the drama queen is more about the drama than being a friend. If she knows something juicy that will gain her attention simply from knowing and spreading the information, she will likely sell you out for the traction the story will gain her.

The drama queen usually can’t stop herself. She is completely unaware that what she is doing is hurting anyone. Using the guise of being concerned about you and trying to enlist people to help, there is normally nothing that is off limits. All it takes is a bless your heart and she can tell your deepest darkest secrets and make it sound like she is doing you the favor.

# If someone is talking badly to you about someone else, they are also talking badly about you to someone else

We all make the mistake of thinking that we are exempt from ugliness. Be very careful who you trust, especially when someone is badmouthing someone else. The truth is that if someone is betraying the trust of another person to you, they’re going to turn around and do the same to you.

They don’t have one set of rules for your friendship and then another for the person about whom they’re dishing to you. It’s just a matter of time before your secrets are being spilled out of their forked tongue. Don’t trust someone who can’t keep someone else’s secret; you are not that special.

# Trust is NOT a two-way street

Just because they trust you, that does not mean that you can trust them. If they have told you very secretive things in the past, don’t assume that means that you can tell them things. Some people know that by self-disclosing, they will gain entrance into your trust. Once there, they will tear you apart. Knowing that you are an honest person and will hold their secrets can be an even larger incentive for them to spill yours.

# Don’t work under the assumption of innocence until proven guilty

If people are telling you about what someone is saying about you, listen. Most of us like to believe that we know better and don’t want to accept when someone tells us differently. Instead of just blindly believing, confront the person and think about things logically.