8 Things That You Should Not Changes After Marriage

'Oh, wait until ou get maried, everything will change then...', this statement freaks out almost everyone. Undoubtly few things do change after marriage, but its not like 100% spin chinge in your life. Actualy, there are ample of things that do not change even after marriage. Things only change as mush as you allow them to change in your life. With time person behavior might change in a relationship, and that is a natural human tendency.

Marriage doesnít change people ñ but it can change your expectations. The biggest cause of disruption in a relationship or marriage is a misalignment of expectations. Perhaps youíre not communicating them to each other, maybe you donít even realise you should, but it all comes down to open and honest communication.

Fearing change, and expecting things to stay the same is only going to lead to trouble. Changing and growing together as a couple is part of the excitement of marriage. Here are some of the things that donít change after you get married, unless you want them to and some of the things that do.

# Communication

Thereís a reason why youíll hear over and over again that communication is so important in a marriage. With almost 50% of first marriages ending in divorce, thereís a lot of people out there who (now) understand that a breakdown in communication can quickly lead to a breakdown of a marriage.

Getting your ability to communicate on point before marriage is so important. It doesnít become easier after you get married, and it doesnít necessarily become more difficult, but it can easily be overlooked.

# You Donít Magically Become A Nagging Wife

We hear people joke all the time ëhappy wife, happy lifeí and Iíve lost count of the number of times people have assumed Iím nagging my husband about something.

Just because youíve gone from Miss to Mrs doesnít mean you automatically become a nagging wife. And honestly, it all comes back to point #1, communication. When you donít communicate your expectations, and you donít talk to each other, frustrations can set in and you can start getting snappy and snarky towards each other. But it doesnít happen just because you get married.

# Any Problems In Your Relationship

If youíre tying the knot in hopes that it creates a clean slate for your relationship then you really need to step back and take a moment to evaluate your situation.

Marriage is not a band-aid that fixes any problems. Sure, the honeymoon period is blissful and happy and can make it seem like any problems have faded awayÖ but that ends, and the problems are still there, and often they have festered and become even worse.

If youíre having problems in your relationship, even if they seem small, go and see a marriage counsellor to get them ironed out before you get married. Actually, I always recommend every couple should see a marriage counsellor before they get married ñ itís like a tune-up for your relationship and can help you really sort out any issues with communication.

# Your Sense Of Security

Iíve spoken to a lot of women who believe that getting married will make them feel more secure in their relationship and remove the fear that their partner is going to leave them. This is usually from women who push for marriage in their relationship probably before their relationship is ready for that commitment.

Security in a relationship doesnít come from marriage, it comes from an understanding of each other (see next point), respect for each other, and (of course) communication. Itís not something that can be forced.

# Your Understanding Of Each Other

How well do you know your partner? An understanding of each other goes far beyond knowing each otherís favourite food and weeknight TV show preference. There are some things that you get to know about each other through time and really talking.

Do you know how to make your partner feel better when they are having a down day? Do you know how to tell theyíre having a down day? Do you know their goals and ambitions in life? Do you know what makes them excited and happy?

# Your Household Responsibilities

This isnít the 1950ís, you donít have to be the wife who quits her career to be a homemaker, makes lunch for her husband every day and makes sure her makeup is picture perfect for the moment her husband walks in the door.

I know I keep repeating it, but it really comes down to being clear about your expectations in your relationship. If your partner expects you to quit your job and stay at home to bake and keep house once youíre married, and youíre fully planning on keeping your career and dividing household responsibilities 50/50, then without communicating this to each other thereís going to be some big clashes coming your way.

# Your Goals In Life

It kind of breaks my heart and makes me get all defensive when people expect women to give up all of their life goals and aspirations as soon as they get married. You donít stop being you once you get married. And if you wanted to achieve things in life, or hit certain career goals, these just donít disappear when you say ëI doí.

Donít buy into the idea that once youíre married everything is about supporting your husband, his goals and his career. If this is what you want to do then that is totally different. But your marriage is a union of two people, two equal people with equal choices and equal needs.

# Your Need For Alone Time

Just because you and your husband are now joined in marriage, it doesnít mean that you need to be joined at the hip. My husband has always been the kind of person who needs time alone, and over the last few years Iíve started to really value the time I get to spend alone too, and this doesnít change when you get married.

What fills your cup and recharges your batteries is even more important when youíre married!