9 Real Reasons Why Guys Do Not Want To Date You

In your dating life, it’s completely normal to start thinking, “why don’t guys ask me out?” We know you probably think something is wrong with you, but the fault isn’t always with you. There’s a saying, we accept the love we think we deserve, and that’s primarily where the reasons lie.

Maybe you always go for guys who have major red flags, and that’s why they never ask you out. Again, there are several reasons why men don’t take that leap into asking you out, but it’s not always because of your own flaws sometimes, it’s also theirs.

It could be you just haven’t encountered the right people, or you’re not looking in the right places is there even a right place anyways? Who knows! There is a multitude of reasons why guys fail to ask you out. In this feature, we’ll be listing down those reasons so you can have clarity, once and for all.

# There is no actual reason

Listen, there may not be an actual reason why no one asks you out. Maybe it’s more of a “wrong place, wrong time” type of situation. Sometimes, we tend to overthink when things don’t go exactly as planned in our dating lives.

So before you start asking yourself why don’t guys ask me out, maybe there’s really no specific reason.

Maybe it’s not just the right season for you, or maybe you don’t go out enough. So, don’t automatically assume there’s something wrong with you because you don’t have a date.

# You’re not over your past

We all have a past, and for some of us, our pasts aren’t always pretty. Maybe you’re not fully over your ex, and to be honest, no one wants to get into a relationship with someone who hasn’t moved on from their ex.

Maybe you’re texting for a significant period, and you can’t stop moaning about how your ex broke your heart and how they’re a piece of sh*t. Your feelings are valid, but it can stop guys from asking you out.

After all, who wants to date someone who talks nonstop about their ex? They don’t want to be a filler or rebound, simple as that.

# You just want a man

Do you wonder, why don’t guys ask me out, but then again, you say you don’t care who the guy is as long as you find one? You don’t really care who the man is; what’s important to you is that you have a man. You’re using any guy as a way to fill the void in your heart and life.

The thing is, no guy would want to ask you out if you’re clearly just desperate for any man in your life, whoever it might be. Maybe you’re afraid of being alone, or maybe you have certain issues you don’t want to deal with, but this hinders you from getting asked out.

# You believe you’re flawless

Everyone has flaws. But what’s important is you recognize your flaws and understand that your potential boyfriend doesn’t need to appreciate toxic behavior. If you have a superiority complex or always think that you’re above others, most guys won’t be motivated to ask you out.

This is one of the circumstances where if you’re asking yourself, why don’t guys ask me out, the problem really is yourself. If there’s something that needs to be fixed or worked on, don’t ignore it.

# You don’t know what you want

You don’t necessarily need to know what you want, but saying you want a serious relationship and then treating this guy like a booty call isn’t creating a clear understanding of what the relationship is.

If you’re not sure what you want, you don’t necessarily need to act on it. Indecisiveness isn’t an attractive trait on anyone, so if you don’t know what you want, this can put guys off from dating you or even asking you out.

# You don’t have the same future as them

Maybe you want to live on a farm with ten dogs and have a couple of chickens. There’s nothing wrong with that. But if you’re living in the middle of New York City, then men you’re meeting may not be interested in having that lifestyle in the future. Even if asking you out is just the first of many steps to take, it’s just not practical to ask someone out who wants a different future than you do.

Why would you risk getting your heart broken if you knew from the start you wanted different things, right?

# You’re focusing on men who are into themselves

If you’re asking, why don’t guys ask me out, this is a pretty big reason for why this is the case. If a guy is so narcissistic and self-absorbed that he focuses on nobody but himself, then it’s only natural he won’t even think of asking you out.

The only person he prioritizes is himself, nobody else. So you can’t expect him to ask you out when the thought probably never popped in his head.

# You’re not going with the flow

It’s hard to be relaxed and chill when you really like a guy. But if you’re too aggressive, it’s a turn-off and seen as a warning. Slow things down and try to let them flow naturally. No matter how much you like him, you won’t get anywhere if you aggressively pursue a guy early on.

Guys love a challenge, so if you’re already giving him everything without him chasing after you, then what’s the point of asking you out?

# They’re scared of rejection

You’ll be surprised how many men are scared of rejection. And it’s completely understandable. No one wants to be rejected when they put themselves out there. If this is the reason, assess whether you’re coming off too strong to him or giving the impression you make it a habit to reject guys.

But if this is the reason, you can be certain that it’s not about you, but more about his fear of rejection.