8 Dos And Don'ts In A Relationship Argument

Disagreements within relationships are practically unavoidable for most couples. While some fortunate pairs seldom engage in arguments, comprehending each other effortlessly, the majority of us, mere mortals, frequently find ourselves in minor disputes fueled by confusion or misunderstandings.

Engaging in a disagreement with your significant other doesn't automatically brand you as a deficient partner, nor does it suggest imperfection in your relationship. However, the manner in which you navigate and conclude the argument can significantly shape your image as a good or bad partner, potentially influencing the overall health of your relationship.

Though controlling the occurrence of arguments might be beyond your reach, managing how you handle them remains within your control. Couples may find themselves bickering about a myriad of topics, but common triggers include financial matters, love-related insecurities, and conflicts involving family members. Typically, these disputes originate from seemingly inconsequential differences in opinion.

When such disparities in viewpoint are left unaddressed early on, they tend to fester and transform into feelings of disappointment or, worse, resentment. This underscores the importance of not withholding significant matters from your partner, particularly if they are evolving into sentiments of bitterness or regret.

Arguments and disagreements, in themselves, aren't inherently detrimental. It is the manner in which accusations are hurled or hurtful words are used that leaves enduring scars. While it may be impossible to regulate every argument, you do possess control over how you opt to respond to disputes within your relationship.

The pivotal question to ask yourself during a disagreement is whether you are engaged in the argument to resolve the issue at hand or if your intent is to inflict harm and belittle your partner. It is crucial to recognize that words uttered during an argument cannot be retracted, even if they were unintentionally hurtful.

# Refrain from remaining silent

When your partner confronts you or seeks an answer, avoid ignoring them or sitting in silence as though they aren't significant enough to warrant a response. While it may seem like a strategy to deal with an upset partner, maintaining silence doesn't contribute positively to your relationship. Instead, it can make your partner feel worse, as it appears you're building a barrier by refusing to engage in conversation.

# Avoid resorting to physical actions

Physical aggression only becomes a resort when you lack valid points or an ability to defend yourself. It signals an awareness of wrongdoing and an inability to justify your actions, using physical gestures to assert dominance. Engaging in such behavior is not only counterproductive but can also indicate a toxic relationship. Remember, conflicts can be resolved without resorting to physical confrontation.

# Steer clear of kicking them when they're down

Avoid uttering extremely harsh statements to your partner that are unrelated to the argument just to silence them. Making statements like "You're a disgusting loser who can't hold onto a job. You have no friends, no one likes you... you're so miserable you make me sick..." is not conducive to a healthy discussion. Remember, your partner deserves respect, and once hurtful words are spoken, they cannot be retracted.

# Refrain from threatening your partner

Don't bring up thoughts of leaving or breaking up in the midst of an argument. Regardless of whether it's intended to scare your partner or is a genuine feeling, an angry argument is not the appropriate setting for such a delicate issue. Threatening your partner in any manner is not a constructive way to address conflicts; it might be an impulsive response triggered by the heat of the moment.

# Abstain from using profanities

Avoid verbally abusing your partner or resorting to profanities during an argument to emphasize your point. This only serves to infuriate your partner and escalate the situation. Using such language may cause additional harm and hinder any chance of reaching a resolution. For a healthy approach to arguments, steer clear of using profanities.

# Resist being arrogant

Communicating with your partner in an arrogant manner, such as saying, "So what are you going to do about it?" during an argument, reveals arrogance and a lack of consideration for your partner's perspective. Dismissing their feelings and adopting a dismissive or passive-aggressive attitude hinders the resolution of relationship conflicts. To solve arguments effectively, avoid displaying arrogance and strive to understand your partner.

# Avoid generalizing about their flaws

Refrain from using phrases like "you never" and "you always" during an argument, as they can put your partner on the defensive. Such generalizations turn a single mistake into a lifelong accusation, hindering productive communication. Phrases like "You always do that..." or "You never listen..." are counterproductive unless your intention is to inflict emotional harm.

# Don't confess just to hurt them

Confessing something in the middle of an argument to gain an advantage or see how your partner reacts is counterproductive. Statements like "Yes, I spent MY money without telling you!" or "I slept with your best friend!" divert the argument into an entirely different direction. In an argument, the focus should be on both partners working together to solve the problem, not on gaining an upper hand.