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What Do People Do In Relationships That They End Up Regretting
By: Kratika Sat, 21 Aug 2021 8:52:35
Looking back on a previous or even a current relationship, there are a few moments that make you cringe, perhaps something you learned the hard way not to do anymore, or even something that you did in a moment of weakness. Whatever it is, big or small, it hopefully led to a lesson learned.
What makes the situation better is that you’re not alone. Whatever mistake you’ve done, chances are, someone out there has done it too. It doesn’t mean it’s okay, but it does offer some consolation. For those of you who may be inexperienced, or even those who want to look back and reflect, this little list is for you.
# Lying and concealing the truth
Not only does this lead to arguments, sadness, and general feelings of misery, it also breaks trust. Trust is one of the hardest things to earn back after you’ve lost it, but it is possible. However, do you really want to spend months or years earning it back? Lying to your partner simply never ends well.
# Not managing your anger well
This can lead to arguments, yes, but in the heat of the moment, you might also end up saying things you can never take back. Not only does that open the door to abusive behavior, but it can also lead to simmering feelings of resentment that can bubble over into an outright breakup.
# Cheating
Not only are you violating your commitment to each other, you’re also saying your partner isn’t good enough or isn’t giving you what you need from a relationship. It’s a nonverbal attack on your partner, and it’s a hurtful one to recover from even if you get a second chance.
# Abuse
This could mean physical, emotional, or mental abuse. While not everyone is guilty of physical abuse, many people don’t realize that mental and emotional abuse are also easy to commit.
Neglecting your partner’s emotional wants and needs is a form of emotional abuse. Berating your partner and always bringing up their shortcomings is an example of mental abuse. These things may not seem that big a deal at first, but just imagine what it would be like to feel neglected and criticized on a day to day basis.
# Taking your partner for granted
It’s unfortunate how common this is. When someone puts their heart and soul into their relationship, oftentimes, the other person may feel like they can take the backseat and fall asleep. It’s not auto-pilot, it’s not a road trip, this is a relationship. If one person does everything, but the other barely does anything or barely acknowledges the effort their partner is putting in, resentment occurs.
# Attributing unhappiness to your relationship
This only applies to situations wherein you blame your relationship for your unhappiness without being honest with yourself about other aspects of your life. Everyone has had a time in their life where they feel lost. Problems at work, arguments at home, and lacking a sense of direction are examples of situations where one can feel almost helpless.
It’s during these times that your relationship seems to be strained. Many people make the mistake of attributing their unhappiness to their relationship, and they end up breaking up. And later on, when they realize they were actually happy and stable in their relationship, they regret their actions. Every time you find yourself in this predicament, take the time to see what external factors are bringing you down.